A Question of Taste

Breaking Down the Button Down

2008-09-03T23:25:00.005-04:00

While NYC might be a mecca of cutting edge fashion, it can be shocking how some New Yorkers make absurdly plain choices. This is never as apparent as when one enters one of the many pseudo-trendy bars or lounges and notices the number of low quality button downs... Apparently, many men feel they must sport this basic in order to achieve the look demanded of them by impressively ambiguous dress codes. While quite a few guys out there aren't guilty of this (good job, kids), far too many fall victim to their own ignorance, or perhaps they allow themselves to be far too cavalier when it comes to this wardrobe staple.

While the following may be more arbitrary than definitive, we'd like to separate the world of button down analysis into general aesthetic categories... Let's start with what seems to be the hot look this season...

(1) Plaids (or any other sometimes abrasive patterning)

Bets and I been saying this for the past year... plaids and flannels (in shirt form) are on their way back. True, they're a cyclical sort of textile, wafting in and out of the fashion world's sensibilities. The great thing about these styles of button-down shirts is that you don't necessarily have to worry about high-end fashion in order to rock it effectively. This look is more about ease and comfort rather than style, but luckily handles all needs.

(2) Classic White (the same rules apply to solid colors in general)

Now I know what some guys think... there isn't much difference between one white button-down and the next. However, because it's such a basic, there's an incredible variety out there of these basic whites. This also means that what is appropriate for the workplace isn't necessarily ideal for a night out. While you might jump to a Banana Republic white dress shirt for the office, it's advisable to think more tailored or interesting designs for when night falls. Now, it's not just a matter of upgrading the shirt to, say, a slimming Charles Tyrwhit. One of our friends opened our eyes to Trovata and the simple yet effective details that it provides their men's whites. The quality of fabric also plays a large role... while it's nice to know that you're rocking a beater underneath that crisp white shirt, no one needs to see the outline of the entire thing through your shirt.

(3) Miscellaneous Detailing

The most obvious differences one can determine are when a shirt has added detail... it could just be what looks like someone scribbled on the shirt via a sewing machine... or it could be ornate embroidery of any design. Now don't get confused... just because a shirt (or anything else, really) has that little something extra does not mean it's a good thing. Designers have found it far to easy to keep adding more and more, how should we say, wiggity wack trim, but it's up to us, the consumers, to separate the proverbial wheat from the chaff. Examples: good - simple detailing on the reverse side of the cuffs, creating a pleasant contrast when the sleeves are rolled up. bad - embroidery and stamps resembling mallards. Hideous.

Celebrity Time Machine: Umbrella Remix Edition

2008-07-14T23:45:00.004-04:00

There had been something bothering us about Posh Spice-Beckham lately. We couldn't quite put our finger on it and only just realized the distinct truth that Spice-Beckham has stolen Rihanna's fashion soul.

Frightening.

Ode To Simplicity

2008-07-09T23:33:00.000-04:00

Light gray belted t-shirt dress:

Jeans, v-neck, blazer:We love the simplicity.

Question of the Day: Why Wasn't Our Prom Dress This Awesome

2008-07-07T23:22:00.000-04:00

And as a follow up why is Joy Bryant wearing a corsage on the red carpet?

Redacted v.2.0

2008-07-03T23:17:00.001-04:00

We may have made a joke or three about the fact that while it's a shame that people are speculating over Keira Knightley's weight and/or potential anorexia, at least she is showing solid fashion sense.

Right. Well, perhaps it's time to take the "tablecloth" out of the wardrobe and have ourselves a little cheeseburger, no?

Celebrity Time Machine: Eva Longoria Parker

2008-06-29T10:48:00.001-04:00

Actually, it should be called celebrity twin machine. All those years in the Swiss Alps have been good to Shania Twain.

Dear Stylist: We're Pucci'd Out

2008-06-25T07:08:00.004-04:00

Dear Stylist,

Christina Aguilera is wearing way to much Pucci lately. It's just so very Carmela Soprano at a cocktail party.

To avoid looking like the very rare yet widely available on ebay for $7.99 Christina Aguilera Barbie, we suggest limiting the Pucci wardrobe to scarves and headbands only please.

Thank you.

Yours truly,
The Aesthetes

Question of the Day: Is Heidi Klum Wearing Jazz Shoes

2008-06-23T23:28:00.000-04:00

Um. Yeah. We're going to go ahead and look in other direction.

Michelle Williams: Brilliant on the Red Carpet

2008-06-22T23:19:00.001-04:00

We've always thought Michelle Williams has been brilliant from the start in her red carpet choices. We offer you a brief journey back in time of some of our favorite highlights.

The 80s Look Great on Ashley Olsen

2008-06-18T21:54:00.005-04:00

We love the 80s.

With the Cosby Show, Alex P. Keaton and Miss Jackson (if you're nasty), the cultural riches from this decade of our youth are endless (shout out to Taylor Dane, Rick Astley and Tony Toni Tone).

What we're not loving is every hipster wannabe embracing the fashion of the decade like Milli Vanilli clutching feverishly to their Grammy (that means you Vanessa from Gossip Girl). Yet once again, the enigma that is the Olsen twins strikes again and this time it's Ash.

Domo arigato Mr. Robato, the 80s look great on Ashley Olsen.

Happy Birthday Blog!

2008-06-18T00:00:00.001-04:00

After over 150 posts we find ourselves one year older if not so significantly wiser (we still don't understand stirrup pants, Rumer Willis and the appeal of '90s fashion). A Question of Taste turns one year old today! To all our friends and fellow Aesthetes: thanks for reading.

Denise Richards: Mallrat

2008-06-17T22:32:00.006-04:00

Why is Denise Richards wearing so many bad mall outfits lately? This phenomenon seems to have started around the debut of her new reality show Denise Richards: It's Complicated (yes, we're admitting to watching if only to bathe in her deep, authentic, midwestern accent).

Apparently she picked up a crocheted dress at JC Penney, matched it up with a jacket from Wilson's Leather, took a break at Wetzels Pretzels before scooping up a dress at Rave and a hat at Delia's right before stopping by Spencer's Gifts and Things Remembered to get that perfect, personalized, engraved gift she'd been looking for.

Sisterhood of the Traveling Crossroads

2008-06-15T22:48:00.007-04:00

We like to pretend we don't see bad chick flicks. We like to pretend that we didn't find ourselves in the theater in opening night of Crossroads or that we aren't on pins and needles for the premiere of Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2. But we have to admit, if nothing else, chick flicks are often fertile ground for future starlets to hone their skills, talent, and fashion sense. Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants sprouted some of our favorites.

America Ferrera (SoTP/Ugly Betty)

Alexis Bledel (SoTP/Gilmore Girls/Sin City)

Phat Tony has spent years unabashedly loving the wonder that is Alexis Bledel. Of course, this was, in every possible way, limited to Gilmore Girls, a fading, but true hybrid of ABC Family and Family Guy (literally... Daniel Palladino was a writer and producer for both)

Blake Lively (SoTP/Gossip Girl)

A Question of Taste: Nature vs. Nurture

2008-06-09T02:23:00.002-04:00

Apparently an Aesthete is born at an early age. Even back in the days of Smurfs and Muppet Babies, Betsy and Phat Tony had distinct fashion points of view. Sadly, other, differing opinions were often foisted upon us by meddling parents. We remember clearly the irritation when the offending items were introduced into our wardrobes. For Phat Tony it was the dreaded cardigan while Betsy feared the floral dress.

While there's nothing inherently evil about said garments we nonetheless had violently negative reactions to them. To this day, neither of us can stomach either of these trends which have recently become a part of mainstream adult wardrobes.

As you can see fair reader, there's nothing that horribly offensive about either item. Aside from the danger of looking like Mr. Rogers when wearing a male cardigan or like a librarian in a floral dress, most laypeople can pull off wearing both. For us however, we're just not going there. We're too busy playing Mario Kart and Zelda anyway.

Whining Over Wine: Episode Three

2008-06-06T02:05:00.002-04:00

Hello all, Phatty Tonz here (go with it, it's new, I'm trying it out)... true, it's been a while since I've blogged, but please know that while I cannot sufficiently apologize for my absence, I have been taking this time alone to be taking part in some introspection. And of course, by that I mean blatantly self-serving and bizarrely self-important judgment. Welcome to my world. Jump on in, the water's fine.

That being said, before I attempt a re-genesis of sorts, I felt it best to discuss arbitrary items with my cohort, and let's face it, my muse. And by "muse," I mean a wonderful individual who fully validates everything I say, so matter how absurd. Thanks Bets, you're major.

But I digress... here's a glimpse of the amazing nothingness that helps make our friendship so deep, so real. It's special. Obviously.

9:45 PM
Phat Tony: Bets, seriously, while I love So You Think You Can Dance (hereafter, SYTYCD), I'm kind of over the audition process. While the rest of the world might be all about bad dancers thinking they're good, in large part to misdirected and unintelligent stage parents who don't understand when "being supportive" equals "ruining someone's life via fake compliments and rainbow sequins," I can't help but hurt for all the potentially talented folks who are making bad reality tv decisions. For example, Xtina should not be an inspiration - 10 too many red and blonde hair extensions aren't going to make Mia Michaels love you.
Betsy: Wait, so her hair is too long or too voluminous?
PT: Too voluminous... we're talking Ricky's, here.
B: Like the Jessica Simpson and Ken Paves line "hair-do"
PT: it was a hair-don't.

10:35 PM
PT: Lisa on Top Chef has the worst haircut ever. it's one thing to get the most butch haircut in the world if you just don't want to deal with doing your hair everyday. It's completely valid, it's an efficiency argument, you don't care how your hair looks so you don't want to take the effort. Fine. But she clearly uses product, but it looks horrible. And she looks like a truck driver.
B: I AGREE!
B: There's so much that bothers me about her. I hadn't put my finger on the hair though.
PT: And also, I don't care how into your craft you are... if you're the type to want to do reality tv, don't spend your time at SuperCuts. She should know better. Anyone who so obviously likes watching themselves should know better.
PT: On another note, I'm SO over the barbell eyebrow ring. If you're gonna do lesbian-chic, try harder.
B: Were you really ever into it? Of course, aside from the three weeks in 1994 that Manic Panic hair dye seemed like a good idea.
PT: You're right... but I think I was supportive of people who were. But generally only the people who spent their entire high school career in art studio.
B: Yeah, there was always a lot of scowling and Doc Martins in those art studios.
PT: And a lot of really really straight hair.

10:49 PM
B: One thing I never understood about Top Chef is how every season has had a contestant with a mohawk.
PT: I believe the faux hawk is an easy solution for folks with thick straight hair who are sick of hair that sticks straight up for no reason.
B: You know when you put it that way, I'm definitely not going to hate on that solution... mainly because there's nothing I hate more than a dude who spikes his hair straight up in the air.

Bromance

2008-06-05T19:11:00.005-04:00

Brody Jenner: Hey Dude
Kevin Federline-Spears: Yo yo Brody, what's happening?
BroJ: Oh nothing man, just trying to get up in that reality show limelight as my own person. I just signed a deal with MTV to do my own show called Bromance. FINALLY, I can get out of the long Lauren Conrad shadow.
KevFed: I feel you dude. I've been trying to get out of the wife's shadow fo'eva.
BroJ: Don't you mean ex-wife?
KevFed: Whatever, she's still the ball and chain weighing me down. Why can't I go to rehab? Where is the paparazzi when I go shopping at Ed Hardy? Where are my record sales? Popozao.
BroJ: Gesundheit, I think you could probably go to rehab if you really wanted to.
KevFed: Ugh, she just makes me so mad. No one's letting me perform at the Music Video Awards drunk with no rehearsals. No one says boo when I shave my head.
BroJ: Well, at least you've got that Asian inspired shirt.
KevFed: Yeah, I like yours too. Lightning! It's like Fire. Bold choice man, bold choice.
BroJ: Oh look! I think we're being photographed. It's the shirts man, I think it's finally working!

Question of the Day: What Former Project Runway Contestent Was Recently Unleashed on Hollywood

2008-06-03T08:06:00.002-04:00

Seriously, where are Michael Kors and Nina Garcia when they're needed:

ill fitting,

unecessarily complex

and badly constructed have come to town, and there's nothing anyone can do to stop it.

Dear Stylist: Short Girls Have Style Too

2008-05-31T06:22:00.001-04:00

Dear Stylist,

No one is saying that Jessica Simpson is not a pretty, sort of semi-talented, girl. We watched Newlyweds: Nick and Jessica too, we're not immune to her ditzy charm, although, perhaps the bloom is off the rose. Let's just say we've been noticing that Jessica has made certain sartorial decisions lately that are questionable at best. Starting with the decision to purchase the majority of her wardrobe at Katrina's Crazy Caftan Emporium.

We can just hear our critics now. "She's short! She has fashion limitations." Please, we all have fashion limitations. For women these can be summed up in three little words: high waisted pants. For men, let's just go ahead and say the word mesh. Millions of women outfit their small frames in stylish and proportional ways every day. Take for example Rachel Bilson who provides an exact counterpoint to the wardrobe insanity that is Ms. Simpson.

Bilson follows and Simpson overlooks one of our cardinal rules: "When one wears pants, one must also appear to be wearing shoes."

When Jessica wears dresses, they seem to be either too young or too old. Rachel has mastered the gray area of "just right."

Also, by the way Jess, the poncho is not the only way to keep warm. Maybe it's time to invest in a scarf or two to avoid looking like Hoss from Bonanza.

What's that Jessipoo? You're not going to finish your tuna sandwich because you're running out to the mall. Thanks, but we don't eat Buffalo.

Yours truly,
The Aesthetes

Jump Around

2008-05-19T19:29:00.000-04:00

Have you ever thought to yourself, sweet jesus, this trend has gone nuts (think back to capris circa 1998, or poncho's circa 2002). Enter jumpsuits. I mean, they're EVERYWHERE.

We've even seen people even wearing them. Regular people who can't under any circumstances pull them off. People are also blogging about them and not in an entirely sarcastic way.

We can't help thinking, where is the tipping point? Where do we cross the line from ridiculousness into absurdity. Well friends, we think we've found it.

A pastel, floral, lace trimmed, skintight jumpsuit. Just when you think fashion can't go any more wrong. Thank you Chloe Sevigny.

Question of the Day: Is Rumer Willis Just Trying to Hurt Me?

2008-05-19T18:49:00.000-04:00

Because, we get rolling out of bed and down the street for a much needed latte. We get sweatpants, hoodies, hats, and flip-flops, no problem. But when you wear zebra printed leggings. We KNOW you did that on purpose.

Redacted

2008-05-18T18:17:00.001-04:00

We may have poked a wee bit of fun of the Prada Spring 08 line of calf length floral skirts.

Then we saw this:

We'd like to offer our sincerest apologize to the gods of Italian fashion. We get it now.

How To Wear Plunging Necklines

2008-05-17T21:34:00.001-04:00

There are many items of clothing that are just South of flattering (ie: Alicia Keys Jumpsuit). The plunging neckline seems to be one of them. Note carefully Cynthia Nixon (second from right) and then Charlize Theron.

Why does the Charlize Theron version work for us and the Cynthia Nixon version not? A few observations:

1. The bold purple works to lend a lighter note to the look because serious, and this dress is cut down to the navel, don't really go together.

2. Ms. Nixon's dress is floor length. (See above re: seriousness)

3. As loath as we are to endorse ruffles, in this case, it draws the eye up and prevents the wearer from looking a bit, well, saggy.

We don't pretend to have the power to stop all of humanity from making bad fashion choices (crocs, et al) but should you happen to choose to journey down this path of plunging necklines, just remember, there are rules and you've been warned.

The Madden, The Man, The Accessory

2008-05-16T08:28:00.002-04:00

Does anyone else think it's creepy that the on-again, off-again, best friend, reality show duo of Nicole Richie and Paris Hilton are dating identical boyfriends?

Apparently the new hot accessory in Hollywood is a Madden brother. Unfortunately, they are VERY limited edition with a waiting list longer than Hermes'.

Question of the Day: Is Janet Jackson Starting her Own Religion?

2008-05-16T07:57:00.001-04:00

If so, sign us up. Way better soundtrack than Kaballah.

Dear Stylist: Are Those Dance Tights?

2008-05-14T19:45:00.015-04:00

Dear Stylist,

We recall the halcyon days at the McDowell School of Dance with a certain reverie to be sure. It is as if just yesterday we were bombershay and brush stepping around the tap studio with unbridled glee. I mean, we were 9, a time where one is highly prone to unbridled glee as well as embarrassing enthusiasm. It is also with some embarrassment that we recall our favored post dance class outfits. Well, at least one of us does. While Phat Tony could be found wearing a sensible ensemble of cropped sweats, denim jacket and legwarmers* (it was the 80s), I was given to wearing shiny dance tights, a short skirt and a beret of choice (sometimes with puffy paint laden scrunchie, sometimes without).

Oh....awkward, um, hi Beyonce, great music. We certainly rock out to Upgrade U at almost every workout, and we've been practicing our shuffle, shuffle, hair toss, in case we have to perform with you at the next Grammy's (we've since, in turn, assumed that the crawl-crawl-hair toss move circa Crazy in Love is SO over). We've just been a little confused re: the outfits lately. Clearly, you have the option of looking like this.

Yet often you choose to outfit yourself like Coco from Fame. I mean, are you always on your way to rehearsal?

And you and your new husband Mr. Carter clean up quite nicely.

Yet, on TRL it's one big denim on denim monstrosity.

Maybe we do get it. Maybe you're just that big of a star and you are so bored that you are keeping us guessing on purpose. Sort of like the magic spell that Brangelina has pulled on the public, are we pregnant, are we not, are we going to deliver our next child on the international space station.

Well in that case, Shazam!

Yours truly,
The Aesthetes

* See also Phat Tony's upcoming book of short stories "Bitch Tore My Leotard."

We Love Capers

2008-05-14T19:33:00.002-04:00

Are we the only one's who love capers? Never being able to claim loyalty to either the sweet or salty camps we appreciate an order of nachos just as much as a scoop of ice cream. When we are in the mood for saltiness, capers add just the right flavor to salads, sauces and most recently pasta. We came across an easy and superbly tasty recipe from the Kitchn for Lemon Pepper Pasta (curtesy of Trader Joe's) with capers and a lightly creamy sauce. Enjoy!

Lemon Pepper Pasta with Capers

3 large garlic cloves, minced
Zest of 1 lemon
1 tablespoon butter
1 tablespoon olive oil
1 cup chicken or vegetable broth
1/4 cup cream
1/4 cup capers
Salt and freshly ground pepper, to taste
1 8-ounce package Trader Joe's Lemon Pepper Pappardelle Pasta

Slowly cook the garlic and lemon zest in the butter and oil, in a heavy saut pan over medium heat. Stir frequently to keep the garlic from browning. When the garlic is soft, add the broth and turn the heat to high. Simmer until reduced by at least one half, and add the cream and capers. Turn the heat back to medium and simmer until thick and syrupy. Taste and season.

Meanwhile, cook the pasta according to directions (2 quarts of salted water, 8-10 minutes). Drain and toss with a dribble of olive oil. Pour the cream sauce over and toss. Serve immediately.

My So-Called Fashion Sense

2008-04-23T20:31:00.008-04:00

It's official. The 90s are back and we're not the only ones who have noticed.

You think you can hide out there Mr. & Ms. General Public? We see you in your floral prints, your little backpacks, belted cardigans and your chunky shoes.

We have a prediction for you, babydoll dresses, reddish-brown lipstick and rollerblading will soon seem like a great idea.

Oh and also, you will be totally in love with Jordan Catalano. And you will almost touch his shoulder during a pop quiz.

Kris Kross will make you Jump Jump

2008-04-22T19:18:00.001-04:00

Phat Tony: Hey Gurrrrl.
Betsy: what's happening?
PT: Absolutely everything. I was just standing in line at Starbucks waiting for my tall, non-fat, extra-caramel, caramel macchiato when I realized that women have been wearing a lot of jumpers lately.
B: jumpers like an Anglophile's sweater or jumpers like when we were 5?
PT: Jumpers like when we were 5.
PT: I mean granted, most of them have worn it under a suit jacket in some sort of semblance of professional-wear but I just keep thinking why is this necessary? I mean, how are you comfortable removing that jacket when you have something like THAT underneath. I mean, regardless of the color of the garment it skews towards the juvenile.
B: Perhaps something like this?
PT: Haha, maybe not entirely that bad but seriously not good either.
B: yeah, I don't really get jumpers, I mean, they got semi-trendy for 5 minutes 3 years ago and the fact that people are still wearing them is really pathetic
PT: True that.

We Love Ricotta

2008-04-22T18:41:00.003-04:00

Ricotta is an amazing cheese for several reasons not only for its starring role in lasagna. Don't get us wrong here, we are also fans of parmigiano reggiano (especially when spoken with a deep and somewhat phony Italian accent), goat cheese, and the all important mexican mix pre-shredded variety but still, with all the options, ricotta has some surprising and unexpected uses.

We recently had brunch at Vento where we sampled a duo of olive tapenade and ricotta spread served with a lovely crusty bread. Dipping into the ricotta, we thought, what is this magnificence? It turned out to be a surprisingly simple concoction of ricotta, olive oil, salt and pepper. We wouldn't want to dole out an exact recipe here, but note that if you apply each ingredient to taste, you can't really go wrong.

We've recently heard talk of using ricotta at breakfast time.

Simply composed of ricotta, a drizzle of honey and a sprinkling of either fresh or dried fruit the folks at the Kitchn suggest that this is "a dish simple enough for a fast weekday breakfast, yet still fancy enough to serve to your best company." We agree.

Get It Together: Cousin It Shoes

2008-04-20T19:21:00.002-04:00

Dear Kate Moss,

Right, so you're cute in that "maybe I partake in the occasional illegal substance but at least I don't eat junk food sort of way." For this reason, we've consistently looked the other way during your five year fling with fringed moccasins and/or Pete Doherty.

We're not really going to hate on this choice of footwear too badly because for one thing Kate, you can pull this off. Sienna Miller might be different story but like Charles Barkley, you are not a role model.

What we do take issue with is these little beauties strutting down the Etro runway.

Look closely, squint if you have to, but these are actually a pair of suede fringed sandals a la Cousin It. Do you hear me Moss? Fringed. Sandals. Suede. We blame this on you. I hope you're happy with yourself.

Yours truly,

The Aesthetes

Herve Leger: Binding Arbitration

2008-04-20T14:51:00.006-04:00

We have noticed a plethora of starlets sporting the Herve Leger "bandage dress," on the red carpet and oftentimes the exact same version.

There's nothing wrong, per se, with this look it's just that it seems a little...well...binding.

And we missed the memo dictating that constipated was the new black.

Plaid Love: Redux

2008-04-20T13:40:00.011-04:00

If we loved plaid last summer, we are in a long-term codependent on-again off-again relationship with it now. Phat Tony has been waxing eloquent about flannel for ages and I, having embarrassing tendencies towards adoring all things Français, am enamored with the twist of irony and the references to "American redneck culture" with which the French have embraced plaid recently. Specifically note the below courtesy of Sartorialist.

We love plaid. We love that it references both the music of the Keiths (otherwise known as Toby Keith and Keith Urban) as well 1990s grunge. We love that it can be edgy or preppy, male or female, French country or American classic. We think a pattern so protean is more than just a trend but embodies true staying power.

Teeny Tiny Backpacks

2008-04-20T11:04:00.009-04:00

Are we entering the phase where the mid-nineties has become nostalgic and retro? I mean, how else can we explain the return of the dreaded belted cardigan. Once we started seeing women sporting the mini-backpack (mini-pack) trend of '96 we wondered what next? The Britney Spears cropped shirt, the ubiquitous Mayim Bialik hat, the painted-on Cindy Crawford mole? Shudder to think. Seriously though, we have seen people rocking these lately.

We clearly approve of the man-bag concept and especially a technologically advanced, ergonomically correct backpack. It begs the question though, if one needs to wear some sort of carryall that requires distribution over both shoulders due to its weight, perhaps said weight should be heavier than your Louis Vuitton change purse, your iPhone, and your L'Oreal Infallible Never Fail Lipcolor.

We, of all people, realize that fashion is not always utilitarian but seriously, this mini-pack trend is wholly useless. Unless of course you've been cast as Lacey Chabert's character in your community theater's upcoming revival of Party of Five. In that case, party on.

Welcome Back Blogger

2008-04-20T10:36:00.007-04:00

Hi, what's your name?

So we realize we've been a little M.I.A. lately. We've been busy. I mean, with starting intensive doubles bocce ball lessons, seriously overconsuming Pellegrinos and Fizzy Lizzies and watching the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants on repeat, we've barely had time to focus on any real actual work, let alone the important task of spreading our missives in re: good taste.

There was also that slight sojourn we took to consult on a fashion show for a line which will remain nameless but that we will refer to by its top secret code name of "Honey Slim." Let's just say our new choreography of "walk walk walk walk turn walk sneer walk walk walk exit" revolutionized the entire situation.

And lest we forget we also attended the McDowell School of Dance spring recital which also happened to be the 25th anniversary celebration. We haven't seen so many feathers, sequins, and jazz hands put to good use in ages, if ever.

However, have no fear, we are back and it feels good to be home.

Weighing In: March 17th

2008-03-17T22:34:00.003-04:00

PH: I've decided I don't like wearing green when arbitrary tradition suggests I do so.

B: No worries, St. Patty's is just one of those holidays we just "don't do." Sort of like Halloween.

PH: It's the forced textile-related traditions. We enjoy having full control over our wardrobe choices. Can't mess with that.

B: Clearly.

Whining Over Wine: Episode Two

2008-03-07T16:53:00.006-05:00

Bravo TV: How Far the Mighty Are Falling...

Betsy: yo yo
Phat Tony: hey stranger
PH: how've you been?
PH: And speaking of one's current emotional state, and thus media stimuli that will inevitably affect such state... how ridiculous does that new Bravo dance show sound? So ridiculous, basically because Elizabeth Berkley is the host.
PH: I mean, is she the best they could do?
B: oh god yeah
PH: And did you see her try to do a dance move/dance pose in the previews?
B: oh god no
PT: Her pose looked like her dance experience was limited to Greek Week dance team and Cardio Striptease. And yeah, sure... Showgirls.
B: mmm, P-Tone, this could be THE new justin bobby... We must watch this show
PH: Obviously.
B: I mean, greek week dance team that is a pretty spot on reference
PH: I don't think I had uttered those words since college UNTIL I saw her.
PH: I mean, there's something very real and disturbing when sorority girls have that blind sort of self-confidence...
like, they're amazing dancers because last weekend, their sorority sisters totally cleared the floor at barn dance.
B: Are there any promo pics for this show yet... let me check
PH: There have to be.
B: Here's the Bravo website, I'm not seeing anything great on google ...
PH: And another thing... what kind of excessive name is that? It seriously made sense to them to combine the names of borderline tired dance-themed movies and Paula Abdul's mid90's dance mix CD = New Bravo reality show title?!
B: blog this immediately

Celebrity Time Machine: The Mask Edition

2008-03-07T00:27:00.005-05:00

Surely you know by know that we have a healthy respect for Ms. Diaz and especially several of her movies (Charlie's Angel Trilogy, My Best Friend's Wedding). But I think we can all tell where this is going:

Classic Denim

2008-03-02T18:31:00.005-05:00

Ladies and gentlemen, we present you the top two reasons the WHOLE ENTIRE WORLD needs to take one giant step away from "trendy denim."

I mean, not that you're taking your fashion cues from Mario "stonewashed" Lopez and/or Mariah "she of the unflattering pants" Carey. At least we hope you're not. Right?

Back When Cher was Awesome

2008-03-02T17:24:00.003-05:00

We can't seem to avoid sequins lately to the extent that it's become a predictably standard sight on any given night out. The dedicated reader knows how we feel on the issue; sequins are a vaguely showy element of fashion that must exist in an appropriate time and a place. Sequined sneakers, obviously, are a clear no but a more subtle and mixed use of sequins can be palatable. Take for example Heidi Klum pairing a sequined top with a structured blazer. We like that. We also like sequins mixed with any sort of tweed or wool or other heavier fall more daytime appropriate fabric. We can't explain why, we just think it makes a lot more sense then wearing a plain be-sequined dress. Said plain sequined dress is not necessarily a faux pas per se, it's just so boring on its own, even before considering the fact that you can count on at least one if not five other women wearing something similar and making your wardrobe seem a bit standard issue.

On the other side of the coin, some uses of sequins are the farthest things from boring. We were at a party a few weeks ago and we swear to you on ice cream sandwiches that there was a girl wearing a sparkly matching two piece ensemble of some sort of halter top and pants. Seriously, this is something that we couldn't even make up if we tried. We could NOT figure out what was going on except that sequins have been put in the hands of people who clearly don't know how to use them. Lets be really brutally honest here, Cher could never really pull off these types of looks. Not even back when Cher was awesome.

We Love Boat Shoes...

2008-02-27T22:10:00.002-05:00

But we're not going to tell you why until Summer. Call it a preview if you will.

AQoT: Live From the Red Carpet

2008-02-24T20:31:00.007-05:00

And by live from the red carpet we mean live from the red carpet in our pj’s, on our couches, with snacks. Let the games begin.

6:00pm Sweet Jesus what is Seacrest wearing? A black suit with brown trim? In what parallel universe is this a good idea? Has he no access to GQ? Think man, we beg of you, WWNPHD? We don’t care if this is Dolce & Gabbana, we’re looking at a black on black shirt/tie combination.

6:13pm Oh snap, Kimora is here, get ready for some crazy. Aside from her wearing all of South Africa’s diamonds, she looks surprisingly almost subdued in her long navy dress.

6:22pm Heidi Klum is in a nice Cayenne dress. Strapless with some sort of cute bolero that perhaps we’d be mocking if this weren’t Heidi Klum. Seal has a really fabulous accent. Wait a minute, they just panned down. This dress has some kind of fish-tail cape situation which leaves us feeling confused and a little bit hurt.

6:51pm Jason Bateman wearing the standard tux and of course, it’s hard to go wrong with that. Sidenote: why do we love the Batemans, Jason and/or Justine, so much. PH: do you want to weigh in on that one?

6:52pm There are a LOT of one shoulder dresses this year. Toga style.

7:09pm Dwayne “the Rock” Johnson is here. Irrelevant.

7:14pm Amy Adams is doing an amazing forest green perhaps a redhead cliché but still, it’s working. Ah yes, Proenza Schouler. Love it.

7:21pm Laura Linney and Jennifer Garner in black. Yawn. I’d have fallen asleep completely except for some awkwardness involving Gary Busey. Or Nick Nolte. One can never tell the difference.

7:47pm Kimora and Giuliana DePandi Rancic are hating on Amy Adams dress. And they’re wrong, obviously.

7:58pm Renee Zellweger looks uncomfortable with her hair. Awkward.

8:12pm John Travolta looks like he’s wearing a hair helmet. His wife is wearing an interesting orangey-yellow which would've been better if it weren't so derivative of Michelle Williams in 2006.

8:19pm Helen Mirren is wearing rhinestone sleeves. Mistake.

8:20pm Both Daniel Day Lewis and Johnny Depp are doing this same black/brown suit situation. We're going to hate seeing this proliferate.

8:27pm Juno (Ellen Page) is wearing black, she looks like herself which we find refreshing.

And the Oscar goes to…

Celebrity Time Machine: All Roads Lead to Winona (and we don't mean Judd)

2008-02-24T18:24:00.003-05:00

I think we all would have no problem predicting what all the chestnut haired waifs in Hollywood will look like in 10 years. Luckily, they have absolutely nothing to fear since all roads lead to Winona.

The Upstarts:

Natalie Portman

b. 1981
Breakout role: "Marty" in Beautiful Girls
Blockbuster franchise role: Queen Amidala in Star Wars I, II, & III
Next project: The Other Boleyn Girl

Keira Knightley

b. 1985
Breakout role: Juliette "Jules" Paxton in Bend it Like Beckham
Blockbuster franchise role: Elizabeth Swann in Pirates of the Carribeans I, II & III
Next project: The Duchess (apparently, "A chronicle of the life of 18th century aristocrat Georgiana, Duchess of Devonshire, who reviled for her extravagant political and personal lives" as per IMDB...sounds riveting).

New Edition:

Ellen Page

b. 1987
Breakout Role: Clearly, "Juno MacGuff" in Juno. I mean how many times do we have to tell you, Tots can't skate.
Blockbuster franchise role: We had thought none yet but actually she played "Kitty Pryde" in X-Men: The Last Stand.
Next Project: Smart People, not much information here except she's joined by Sarah Jessica Parker and Dennis Quaid in this one.

The Original:

Winona Ryder

b. 1971
Breakout role: "Lydia" in Beetle Juice but for us, nothing tops Winona as the "Veronica" in Heathers.
Blockbuster franchise role: um...we always thought Reality Bites could've used a sequel...
Next project: The Last Word, based on a Bret Easton Ellis novel.

We Love Ice Cream Sandwiches

2008-02-23T22:22:00.007-05:00

We're definitely grown-ups as evidenced by a known propensity for easy listening radio, but yet we still have a deep appreciation for this rather childlike food. What could be better than a slab of vanilla ice cream between two chocolate wafer cookies. A classic hit, timeless, sort of like Janet Jackson. Sing it with me now, "when I think of you...baby, all I think about is love." Diversions aside, we learned recently that the venerated ice cream sandwich was actually invented in about 1900 in the Lower East Side. We're not sure when the Chipwich brand variety was invented,

but we definitely remember the summer when Phat Tony introduced us to the ice cream sandwiches at Diddy Reese in Westwood. Your choice of fresh baked cookies surrounding a healthy scoop of the ice cream flavor of your fancy.

When I think of you...baby....

Grammy Hits and Misses... Abridged.

2008-02-19T21:05:00.005-05:00

So the Grammys were weeks ago... Fine. We figured that by separating ourselves from the event might give us some perspective when it came to our gut judgment calls. Perhaps surprisingly, perhaps not, our opinions became even more pronounced as time went on. Sure, they may be trite, but sometimes opinions just need to be expressed. We're sorry. Or you're welcome. You know, whatever.

However, in the spirit of self-restraint, we wanted to limit our opinions to the best and the worst of the Grammys.

Best: Alicia Keys. From her beautiful look when she kicked off the awards to the kick-ass performance of "No One," this was, we think, a high point in Ms. Keys' career. She got herself out from behind that piano (although, please, you shine behind that piano as well), and scream-sang in the way we love. I think I actually started giggling mid-performance, as I tend to do when an artist is so ridiculously amazing that I can't understand where the talent comes from. I don't know what Betsy's immediate reaction was, but I know it was positive.

Worst: Okay, Tina, we've loved you for a while. You've always been a bit crazy, sure, but we don't hate you. You had the Ike-thing to deal with, and that's gotta mess you up something fierce. Fine. Big wheels still kept on turning, and Proud Mary kept on burning. But then you had to show up in a aluminum foil corset/bodysuit. And while no one can be sure, we assume no bra was involved. I won't lie and say that would look horrible on everyone... but babe, seriously, that outfit was not meant for you. No, not at your fitting, and no, definitely not on stage.

And while we're frightened to admit this, we were kind of glad Beyonce was there to back you up. She clearly knew her place, filling in a role as "background dancer" whenever she wasn't featured, but still singing her ass off. And, Tina, we're thrilled you didn't publicly diss her. No one needs another Divas Live moment.*

" In case anyone needs a reminder, picture this: Mariah Carey, with great flourish, gestures to Aretha Franklin and proclaims, "All Hail the Queen of Soul!" And then Aretha turns to Mariah, calmly stating, "and Miss Carey."

Sucks.

Celebrity Time Machine: Tyra Banks is Morphing into My Grandma

2008-02-19T20:40:00.001-05:00

Say what you will about Tyra Banks' career post modeling. Sure, she gained a little weight, and yes, she favors makeup that can only be described as dragqueenesque, but let's not forget that she also has her own talk show on which she features topics as varied as: Why Did You Dump Me and Tyra, Help My Mom Find A Man. Her other show, America's Next Top Model, has been around for 10 full seasons or "cycles" which really highlights the cultural importance of said programing that they were able to rename the long accepted moniker for "group of shows."

Aside from all that, we'd been noticing something for a few months now and can no longer keep it to ourselves. Tyra Banks is slowly but surely morphing into my Grandma.

As entertaining as this may be for us, it pains us that we can't let you in on the palpable certainty with which we make this proclamation. We realize that you have know way of knowing exactly what my Grandma looks like but lets just say it involves crazy wigs and a lot of this expression.

Dear Stylist: The Other Boleyn Girl

2008-02-18T21:43:00.006-05:00

Dear Stylist,

We're fans of historical fiction, clearly. It's all the drama and intrigue without all the messy ties to what really, actually happened. So with the release of The Other Boleyn Girl, we're pretty excited, especially upon hearing that it would star the eminently watchable Scarlett Johansson and Natalie Portman.

Our eyes skipped by this photo of the starlets at the premiere just as easily as we find ourselves jamming along to a favorite 80s track only to then discover that we're listening to Eaaasy One Oh Two Point Seeeveeeen. Can anyone assure us that we're not the only ones experiencing this phenomenon on a regular basis, please, pretty please?

Upon closer inspection we realize that while Scarlett's dress is a lovely, flattering shade and seems to be a nice classic shape, she is also wearing enough eyeliner to put Lauren Conrad to shame. Subsequently, Ms. Portman is sporting what seems to be a lace tatoo. With strategically placed drapery of course but seriously Portman, Queen Amidala had more red carpet appropriate garb. And she was super-busy saving her planet.

Yours truly,
The Aesthetes

Weighing In: Headbands

2008-02-17T18:13:00.009-05:00

Quite clearly, headbands have been around for a while. A preppy staple, we credit Hilary Clinton's overuse in the early 90s that first launched this trend into a nationally debated topic.

More recently, LC ahem, Lauren Conrad of the Hills fame and recently tapped as a fashion "maven" by some media sources, had been noted for frequent headband use.

What do we think aside from the fact that Lauren Conrad does not a fashion "maven" make? Well let's not split hairs here, I mean, she's wearing a headband, on her head. We really aren't going to spend our time having a whole lot of issues with that choice. What we do have problems with is the quite disturbing trend we noticed all summer of girls in New York wearing headbands around their foreheads hippie style or Rambo style if you prefer. We prefer that this trend go the way of the poncho but we're very afraid after this montage from New York Fashion Week by Fashionista.

Say it isn't so.

We Love Heidi Klum

2008-02-17T17:59:00.006-05:00

Is Heidi Klum not just perfect? Of the many models turned hosts out there (that means you Tyra) Heidi has managed to retain a sort of down to earth appeal that does not rely on convincing the world of the tough life she's had. She also happens to be reasonably likable on camera (that means you Nikki Taylor and Tyson Beckford).

We definitely love the adorable family and as if the seal pups weren't reason enough, she also pulls off the cute printed hoodie look better than Britney Spears, Gwen Stefani and Cameron Diaz combined.

She can also do many things that most people including but not limited to Sienna Miller and Mischa Barton cannot such as high waisted denim.

She's never let us down on the red carpet,

and we love the idea of having a signature style. Ms. Klum has perfected one of our personal favorites, the sequined top/blazer/skinny jean ensemble.

Love is in the Air

2008-02-16T15:05:00.003-05:00

So Valentines day has come and gone but in the sprit of our favorite Saint, we are giving out awards to favorite celebrity couple dress-alikes of 2008.

#5. Best BFFs

#4. Best Faux Rockers

#3 Best All American

#2. Closest Matchy Matchy

#1. Most Annoying Use of Trendy Headwear

Pregnancy Looks Crazy On Halle Berry

2008-02-07T22:17:00.002-05:00

Halle Berry is no doubt one of the most beautiful women in film. She's also a reasonably decent actress with an above average ability to play superheroes. We just have one small question we've been puzzling over.

Since when did Halle Berry become Whitney Houston Circa 1987?

And why hasn't she received the Jolie memo in re: flowy pregnancy garments.

Pregnancy clearly is looking a bit crazy on Halle Berry. Perhaps not "in photos where she was smoking what appeared to be a crackpipe" crazy, but crazy nonetheless.

Attack of the Hung

2008-02-05T23:56:00.001-05:00

There's something special about rooting for the hated contestant on reality shows. Then there's something completely different when a contestant clearly works too hard to be the hated one, knowing that the American public will happily eat up all the related drama. Ew. (Yes, Wendy, we were not so subtly referring to you.) Furthermore, this becomes increasingly annoying when said contestant need not rely on how much he or she is disliked, but instead on his or her sheer talent.

Enter Hung Huynh, recent winner of Bravo's Top Chef. Riding on the melodrama-dripping coattails of his cohort, Marcel (Top Chef runner-up extraordinaire), Hung came onto the show, guns blazing, outwardly repeating that he'll be the asshole of the show, and he doesn't care. Tacky, considering the more we learned about this guy, the more we wanted him to put away his snide commentary and dole out another serving of whatever he concocted. Now that he's won, he has toned down and finally given us what we were waiting for... a heartfelt story and great food. Top Chef has time and again given us quality talent, as opposed to mere reality stars (NB: Top Chef's first winner, Harold Dieterle, and his NYC hit, Perilla) What follows is one of Hung's recipes from the February issue of Food & Wine... enjoy!

Hung's Clay Pot Rice

Ingredients:

1 cup short-grain rice (7 ounces)
3 ounces mixed mushrooms such as oyster and stemmed shiitake, quartered if large (2 cups)
2 scallions, coarsely chopped
1 tablespoon plus 1 teaspoon low-sodium soy sauce
Salt and freshly ground pepper
2 thick slices of fatty bacon, cut into 1/2-inch dice (1/2 cup)
2 garlic cloves, minced
1/2 cup ginkgo nuts (optional)
1 cup water
1 tablespoon vegetable oil

1. In a bowl, cover the rice with water and let soak until the grains turn white, about 1 hour. Drain the rice.
2. In another bowl, toss the mushrooms and scallions with 1 tablespoon of the soy sauce and season with salt and pepper; let marinate for 10 minutes.
3. In a small, enameled cast-iron casserole, clay pot, or medium saucepan, cook the bacon over moderate heat until the fat is rendered and the bacon is crisp, about 5 minutes. Add the garlic and ginger and cook, stirring, until fragrant, about 1 minute. Add the soaked rice and stir to coat with the fat. Add the ginkgo nuts, marinated mushrooms and scallions, the water and the remaining 1 teaspoon of soy sauce. Bring to a boil over moderately high heat. Drizzle the oil around the edge of the pot so it tuns down the insides.
4. Cover the pot and cook the rice over low heat until tender and the liquid has been absorbed, 10 minutes. Raise the heat to high and cook the rice, covered, until sizzling and a crust forms on the bottom (mmmmm), about 5 minutes. Remove the pot from the heat and let stand, covered, for 5 minutes. Fluff the rice with a fork and serve.

Super Guac

2008-02-03T12:08:00.000-05:00

Well friends, it's Superbowl Sunday and I've been forced to watch pre-game coverage starting at 11:00am. I'm not really sure what this is all about but I'm guessing that this is the men's version of the Red Carpet. However, were this a respectable red carpet, Keyshawn Johnson and Emmitt Smith would be getting an earful from Joan and Melissa Rivers right now regarding a certain fuschia shirt and a vest with a bright orange back panel.

Aside from the commercials, the other silver lining to this very special day is the many Superbowl snacks that ensue. This being a very special day indeed our friend Fresh D has been convinced to share his famous guacamole recipe with the readers of AQoT. Get ready people, this is once in a lifetime...

Fresh D's Super Fresh Guacamole

3 ripe Haas avocados
1 small red onion
1 orange bell pepper (red or yellow will do too - I like orange)
2 jalapeno peppers
2-3 plum tomatoes
1 mango (not too ripe)
1 lime
1 tsp. cumin
cilantro
salt and fresh ground black pepper

Okay folks, Fresh D here, I pretty much like my guacamole fresh and chunky -- never too creamy or mushy. That's what this recipe is all about. So let's get it started.

(PH Interjection: Actually, Fresh D, before you begin, I'd like to take the opportunity, in this public forum, to thank you for the birthday breakfast burritos. They were timely and delish. No joke. Okay, please continue...)

Dice the red onion, orange bell pepper and tomatoes and set aside, preferably in some fun prep bowls. Next, seed and mince the jalapeno peppers. If you really like your stuff spicy you can keep the seeds in while mincing the jalapeno peppers, but I don't recommend this.

Now we're up to the star ingredient, the mango! You don't want a very ripe mango because it physically won't hold up to the other ingredients. All we need to do is dice the mango. That may not be as easy as the other ingredients. If you need some tips go ahead and fire up your Google; there are plenty of ways to tackle the mango dicing.

Okay we're ready for the avocados. Go ahead and halve, seed and peel the avocados. Give them all a rough chop leaving you with a few large chunks. Put them all in a large bowl. Now add the juice of 1 lime. Do this right away to prevent oxidation from discoloring the avocados. Using a potato masher add the cumin and salt & pepper (to taste) and mash. You're not trying to make mashed potatoes here so don't go too crazy with the mashing; just enough to get break up the chunks.

Finally, chop a handful of cilantro. Fold in the onions, tomatoes, orange bell pepper, jalapeno peppers, mango and cilantro into the avocados. Add more salt & pepper to taste.

I like to let this marinate for a least a few hours in the fridge. And there you have it... you're now ready to watch the Patriots lose!

M. Anthony Collection

2008-01-28T20:40:00.001-05:00

Hi, I'm Marc Anthony and I'm here to tell you about my new line of menswear. Do you ever have those occasions where you need to jet around town at top speeds yet still maintain the winning good looks of one of Latin America's most renowned vocalists? Do you not yet know how to incorporate mesh into all aspects of your wardrobe? Are you looking for a healthy cross between warm-up pants and a tuxedo? Look no further because I have created this line in response to the needs of you, my loyal fans. Pick up the phone and order right now and I'll even include an autographed copy of my limited edition Marc Anthony: Guide to Style featuring such chapters as "Shiny Shoes, All the Time," and "Really Long Jackets Make You Look Taller, I Promise." Don't wait, operators are standing by.

Get It Together: Some Things Should Be Left in the Past

2008-01-27T21:54:00.001-05:00

We cannot emphasize this enough. Sex and the City was cute from 1998 to 2003 and then Carrie and her ballerina skirts, Samantha and her brash sexuality, Miranda and her sarcasm and Charlotte with her hopeless and thoroughly irritating optimism became only appropriate in the small realm of our special edition dvd boxed sets. There is nothing bothering us more than the trotting out of the middle-aged stars in no longer age appropriate or fashion forward garments for the making and promoting of the sure to be horrible movie version.

You've probably guessed that we're also not thrilled about the Sex and the City wannabes Cashmere Mafia and Lipstick Jungle. Admittedly, having only seen the former, we're nonetheless ready to declare that this, friends, is bad TV and not even the good kind. We even have significant soft spots in our hearts for Lucy Liu after her turns in both Kill Bill and Charlie's Angels but even we can't defend what she's been wearing lately.

Valentino Schmalentino... this dress is ugly.

PH Addendum: Lucy, I don't know if you realize the severity of our words, here... Our love for you used to be pure, unadulterated, and altogether quite lovely. You show up like that, and well, we start questioning everything. The fact that we're alumni from the same college will only get you so far....)

Mystery Revealed

2008-01-27T16:48:00.000-05:00

We had been wondering and wondering about the floral prints that abound in the spring collections of otherwise sane designers like Prada and Balenciaga. We think we have finally uncovered the hidden inspiration for all this.

With characters like Miss Truvy, Claree and everyone's favorite Ouiser, this is a good, nay, great film and an absolutely killer way to spend a Sunday afternoon. But a fashion inspiration for our time? I think not.

Dear Stylist: Get Thee Some Pants

2008-01-22T19:22:00.001-05:00

Dear Stylist,

We never thought we'd have to say this but some articles of clothing bear a certain necessity. Take pants for example. Perhaps if you're an Olsen twin you can get away with belting a huge t-shirt, throwing on 80 bangles and calling it a day but if you're not an alien life form, you might want to take a page out of the playbook of the more pedestrian among us. Top + pants = face the world. Don't get me wrong, we're not saying no to dresses here, we LOVE dresses but dresses fall under the umbrella of the onesie. The rules, friends, are the same as when you were 2. Onesies are acceptable on their own, sweaters, dear stylist, do not qualify.

Yours truly,

The Aesthetes

Celebrity Time Machine

2008-01-21T18:34:00.000-05:00

We just had a chat with our crystal ball and it told us what Fergie Ferg is going to look like in 20 years.

Like the twin sister of Third Rock from the Sun's Kristen Johnston.

Don't say we didn't warn you.

Affordable Art Part Deux

2008-01-20T19:05:00.000-05:00

We have a confession to make. While we like to think we share our opinions and also our finds with the world oftentimes when we find something we really like we might sometimes have the tendency to keep it to ourselves. We've seen one too many great restaurants and hip hop lounges become overrun by recently moved to the city investment bankers or other Long Islanders. Call us smug, elitists if you will, we like to think of it as protective. Unsurprisingly, when we wrote about affordable art we sort of neglected to mention one of our longtime favorites: Antigirl. We love these prints by Tiphanie Brooke which are super affordable ($45) a great size for framing (18x24) and easy to mix and match and create a larger piece by hanging two (diptych) or three (triptych) together.

Check out a more expanded selection of works here.

Dear Stylist: Jumpsuit Edition

2008-01-12T21:39:00.001-05:00

Dear The Fabulous Ms. Keys,

Alicia, darling, honey, sweetie, there are far more flattering options out there, seriously, just right around the corner, if you would just step this way, we promise no one will get hurt. May we please introduce you to the fun and fabulous world of separates?

Yours truly,

The Aesthetes

Ode to the Woman on the Subway: a Haiku

2008-01-09T22:02:00.000-05:00

Mauve and purple don't

go together not even

if both in the scarf.

*****A note to those not appreciating the haiku genre: Phat Tony assured me and consequently assures all of you that Haikus are always funny. Always.

We Love Neil Patrick Harris

2008-01-08T23:38:00.001-05:00

We all need role models and who better than the original blogger himself, Doogie Howser, M.D. Doogie, in all his precocious glory, was at the helm of one of the best of the "lost" sitcoms of the 80s i.e. one's that were not beaten to death by the syndication horse. Really, what's not to love, a 16 year old doctor who actually has compassion and a sense of humor and only mildly grazes the lovable end of the nerd spectrum.

Can you say suspension of disbelief?

Dr. Douglas Howser was adeptly played by Neil Patrick Harris whom we have grown to love more and more over the years.

Clearly Mr. Patrick Harris has grown into a healthy sense of style (and hair products) and has made said transition remarkably better than his peers (see: Fred Savage). He's made such a reasonably smooth transition in the world of celebrity and child stardom even in the face of such obstacles such as coming out and self parody (although the cameo in Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle was hilarious), it has come to the point that whenever we get stuck, we the aesthetes, always ask ourselves what would Neil Patrick Harris do (WWNPHD)? Certainly, this catchy acronym is a clear adaptation of the much more common WWTBFCD (what would the Barefoot Contessa Do)? Look out for WWNPHD bracelets and t-shirts coming soon to a mall near you.

Phat Tony Addendum: We wish that any sort of recent appearances he has made on the world's stage (anything having to do with "How I Met Your Mother," coming out of the closet, etc.) actually improved our opinion of him... However, combine his Doogie beginnings with his Christina Aguilera-esque vocal riffing-con-finger jiggle in "Undercover Brother," and he has already reached a zenith that is virtually uncalled for in the magical world of AQoT. WWNPHD, indeed...

After School Special: AQoT Edition

2008-01-07T22:39:00.001-05:00

Ah childhood...Rice Krispies Treats, Capture the Flag, You Can't Do That on Television...those were simpler times. Unfortunately, our inevitable aging has left us prone to sigh's of "kids nowadays..." as we are confronted with that which we do not understand, Ne-Yo, Gossip Girl, The Hills, Justin Timberlake. Ha, just kidding, we totally understand that stuff. What we don't understand lately is what is going on with the next generation (are we at Z yet?) of budding superstars.

Let's start with Vanessa Hudgens. Fine, she took some pictures of herself naked and in the grand scheme of things we're not going to go all Republican on you and say that this is an immoral thing to do we're just saying, did no one explain to her how the Internet works?

And then there's Jamie Lynn Spears. Sure, Britney has made some bad choices that $100 million should be able to prevent one from making, but at least she had the decency to wait until she was in her 20s to have a baby by her totally not famous boyfriend. Shockingly, Nickelodeon seems not to have a problem with the situation. We wonder if they'll try to cover up Zoey 101's baby bump with strategically placed grocery bags a la Claire Huxtable in the 80s.

Apparently, Lily Allen is also pregnant. While not in her teens, she's also not too far removed and she was recently asked to design a line of maternity clothing specifically intended for juniors, like Delia's juniors, otherwise known as girls in their teens and VERY early 20s. In what universe is that a good idea? The least we can do is force girls to wear ugly florals and stirrup pants through their pregnancy as a deterrent.

We've come to the point where we fully expect the next breaking news item on CNN to be Miley Cyrus' gruesome killing spree.

What have we learned here kids, naked photos and pregnancy will not actually harm one's chances of a lucrative future in Children's Programing and if corporate America had their way we'd have a totally rocking line of skinny jeans and crop tops suitable for the second trimester of only the most fashionable teenagers.

Dear Stylist: Paris Hilton Should Cut Her Losses and Move to Boca

2008-01-06T17:32:00.000-05:00

Dear Stylist,

They tell me Paris Hilton is a young girl. I suppose that's what the dancing on the tables, all too often with hands above head and dare I say snapping, is about. However are we the only ones who have noticed a shift in her wardrobe lately?

We've always preferred Ms. Hilton sans weave but we don't really see the point of teasing the natural do into a poufy oblivion since it seems to add about 40 years to the look. Also, by now hopefully we all can agree on the dangers of wearing animal prints, namely that you look like you've gone one step too far on "vintage" bandwagon and you've spent far too much time poking around in Nana's cobweb-filled closet.

I mean, don't get us wrong, we're certainly not implying that Paris would be anything less than the TOAST of the retirement community and she'd likely land a lucrative deal posing for the cover of Joan Collins next and surely scintillating novel Misfortune's Infamous Daughters. We're just saying that she should strongly consider taking her budding "crazy animal-lady" tendencies to more sympathetic pastures than LA.

I hear Del Boca Vista has a few vacancies.

Yours truly,

The Aesthetes

100th Post and a New Year!

2007-12-31T16:33:00.000-05:00

Happy New Year Everyone! And thank you for reading A Question of Taste. We've reached our 100th post and looking back on the year since the inception of the blog well, we've had a lot to say. We've embraced the idea of the retrospective and the countdown and thus, we thought we'd shine the spotlight back on you and give you a few stats on the AQoT friends out there.

Top 10 Google Searched Topics Leading People to AQoT:

10. How to Wear Leggings (you're welcome)
9. Stina Persson
8. Reese Witherspoon Divorce
7. Nora Caliguri Wedding Dress (so randomly specific)
6. High Waisted Pants (drama)
5. Pizza With Fried Egg
4. David Bromstad (we love him too)
3. McDowell School Of Dance
2. A Question of Taste
1. Justin Bobby

Top 10 (other than U.S.) Countries Reading:
10. Hong Kong
9. Singapore
8. Philippines
7. Spain
6. France
5. Germany
4. Poland
3. Australia
2. Canada
1. United Kingdom

Thanks so much for reading and as always feel free to email us with ideas and comments. We welcome stealthily taken photos of fashion faux pas. Also if you haven't already, join our Facebook group, our friends are hot, yes they are.

New Years Resolution for 2008? AQoT t-shirts. Get ready people. Fashion-forward? Perhaps. Goes with everything? Clearly.

Counting Down: Top 10 Taste Lessons Learned in 2007

2007-12-31T07:17:00.000-05:00

Ah the new year , once again it's time for retrospectives, for toasting with friends, for countdowns. And sure, while we generally respect and incessantly create a safe space for any top 10 or top 5 list, (see Cusack's musings in High Fidelity, a la Nick Hornby), we understand that, like plaids or pleather, there's a time and place for everything. You've got to choose your moments and whatnot. In light of that, pull up a microsuede ottoman or a smartly overstuffed Desmond Ale armchair and stay a while as we count down the top 10 lessons learned through A Question of Taste in 2007.

10. Certain trends went out of style for a reason.

The Wardrobe that Time Forgot
Jodhpurs: Please Hammer Don't Hurt 'Em

9. Some celebrities thrive on a LACK of spotlight.

Obscurity Looks Great on Kelly Osbourne
Unemployment Looks Great on Rachel Bilson

8. Justin Bobby is the most entertaining and ridiculous thing to come out of MTV since Puck from Real World: San Francisco (although we must provide some sort of honorable mention equivalent to Irene from Real World: Seattle and the slap heard 'round the world)

Beanie Man
The Ballad of Justin Bobby

7. Men shouldn't be afraid of a little innovation and risk-taking

The Plural of Man-Purse is Men Purse
Nixon: Less Watergate, More Watch

6. The difference between cutting edge and costume is one pop of the collar away.

Pop Goes the Collar
Deconstructed Preppy: He Said

5. Bad fashion is harmful to one's health.

DEFCON Threat Level 3: Please Step Away from the Crocs

4. Don't wear things that make you look fat

Weighing In: High Waisted Pants
Whining over Wine

3. Sometimes a good dose of crazy is exactly what one needs in life.

Crazy Looks Great on Katie Holmes
Sorry Ash But We've Already Picked Our Favorite Twin

2. Whimsical = Good
Ridiculous = Very Very Bad

Madras Madras Madras
These Kids Nowadays

1. And finally, to all the friends of AQoT out there, grab some Crostini and Prosecco as we toast to wishing you a very Happy New Year and all good things in 2008.

Remember friends, trends may come and go but a good dose of judgment and ridicule lasts forever.

We Love Complex Magazine

2007-12-30T23:40:00.001-05:00

Well, this month, anyway.

It's kind of exciting that there's men's magazine that steers the masses towards smart, fashion-forward decisions when it comes to their purchases. Quality kitchenware? Check. High-end hygiene? Check. The best holiday beverages? Check. Nixon watch promos? Check. Pages and pages of old and new skool kicks? Check.

Of course, there's also my current favorite... Kristen Bell? CHECK.

Sure, the magazine may be a bit self-serving (Yeah, Marc Ecko, we get it, you're SO where fashion is at and all the kids love you and we should only be so lucky to take pointers from a sage like you), but at the end of the day, we're loving the direction Ecko is taking trends when it comes to men's products.

Phylicia, Lisa & Keshia KP - Cosby's Angels

2007-12-30T14:14:00.000-05:00

I know Bets doesn't necessarily experience this day by day, but doing the corporate America thing tends to sometimes stagnate creativity. In light of that, it can be inspiring to witness any sort of reinvention, whether in the office, on the streets or anywhere in the media.

Everyone's made pretty ridiculous aesthetic moves since 1984 (I seem to remember yellow gingham overalls... but I was 5, and in no way in control of my wardrobe), but who knew that some of our favorite ladies from those days would be pulling out some really smart choices in 2007? We don't really want to judge (wait, what am I talking about, of COURSE we want to judge), but I think it must be really difficult to stay very smart and retain the positive aspects of your fashion choices, and carry them through, updating as necessary, while adding another entire dimension to it.

Phylicia Rashad
She's the classic, older woman with a strong presence, just like then, but really has defined a very specific perspective. Claire Huxtable epitomized the archetypical strong working woman. The idea was renegade in the 1980s and only a woman with enough presence to impart strength in the mere raise of an eyebrow could pull it off without coming off as "hard" in any way.

Then:

Now:

Lisa Bonet
Denise Huxtable was always the controversial one on the show. Not entirely buying into Cosby's strict education precepts, she ended up kicked out of the dynasty after her first season on A Different World. Luckily, exit Bonet didn't deprive us of years of Dwayne Wayne, Whitley Gilbert and Jaleesa and that show also thrived for years after her departure. Bonet was always cute but we think she came into her own in the Lenny Kravitz years and peaked in her appearance in the John Cusack film "High Fidelity."

Then:

Now:

Keshia Knight-Pulliam
She went from annoying, only barely cute little girl who was SEVERELY upstaged by the casting of little Olivia to the show, to an arguably drop-dead beautiful woman. I think we all had that moment of whoa is that Keshia KP? while watching the video of Chingy's "One Call Away."

Then:

Now:

Bravo Cosby's Angels, way to keep it together through the decades. We have much to learn from you.

We Love Prosecco

2007-12-30T12:46:00.000-05:00

The Italians have it right: sparkling wine that comes from a tap. There's nothing like a little bubbly-on-the-go. As the New Year (and Phat Tony's Birthday) approaches we reflect on one of our favorite drinks, prosecco. What is prosecco you ask? Quite simply, it's Italian Champagne. Champagne being sparkling wine grown in the Champagne region of France and made using the "Methode Champenoise." Specifically, prosecco originates from grapes grown in the Veneto region of Italy, and was the original ingredient in the famous Bellini cocktails. We love it because it's tasty. We prefer drier sparkling wines and prosecco fits the bill perfectly and accompanies a wide range of our favorite foods such as Pane Frattau and Crostini. Another feature of this particular drink is its affordability. We have yet to taste a bottle we didn't like and most often a good bottle comes in the $9-16 range. Drink up friends, party like it's 1999, and enjoy the New Year.

Weighing In: Sequins

2007-12-30T11:12:00.001-05:00

What comes to mind when we think of sequins? Vegas showgirls, the circus, our tap dancing costumes at McDowell School of Dance perhaps. What does not come to mind? Sneakers. Anyone who knows me knows that my all-stars and I have had a long term exclusive relationship going for some time now. However, not even I would deign to wear the be-sequined versions that started cropping up this year.

Do these shoes not just scream "show choir?" I mean...not that there's anything wrong with that...I'm just saying, there's a time and a place for everything.

And by the way, that time/place is never on TRL.

In order to lead a civilized and fashionable life there must be rules regulations and for sequins, they start off similarly to our rules on plaid. Shirts and dresses only please, any sort of sequined bottom will make you look dangerously like one of those monkeys that play the cymbals. Secondly, we must restrict our use of sequins to the evening hours (this should be un peu obvious n'est ce pas?). Thirdly, and this one is a bit more subtle, a sequined garment must be sequined all over like these few courtesy of I Am Fashion.

Otherwise you run the risk of appearing as if you and your BeDazzler have spent one too many lonely nights together.

Whining Over Wine: Episode One

2007-12-28T18:48:00.000-05:00

There's Nothing I Hate More Than Skin Tight Jeans

B: There's nothing I hate more than skin tight jeans. I mean, it's not something that you'd think you'd need to say... It's sort of obvious that it would look bad, right, but somehow, you keep running into it.

PH: I have issues with the comfort level of the thing. I mean, maybe I'm not the average guy on the street, but tight tight tight jeans screams hell no to me.

B: And for girls, how do you look at yourself in a dressing room mirror, where you already look fatter than what you are, and you say these skinny jeans are a good idea.

PH: Sometimes, those mirrors are there to give you perspective when we aren't in the room. But let's face it.. we don't want to be there, anyway.

B: I think this goes for clingy fabrics. in general... when you put clothes on your body, you shouldn't be able to see the rolls. I mean, everyone has some fat or whatever, and you know, we're okay with it, but the clothes on your body, make no mistake, are meant to camoflauge. Do people not understand this? Otherwise, we'd just be walking around naked all day.

PH: We all have that lady we work with. Babe, your clothes don't fit. And you know, they never did. My bad.

Designer, Don't Fail Me Now

2007-12-27T21:59:00.000-05:00

The holiday season can be rife with disappointments. That one present that symbolized just how little your (insert close friend or relative here) really knew you. The box of chocolates that looked amazing but was secretly filled with cherry liqueur. 'Tis also the season of finding oneself horribly disappointed by the resort collection of your favorite designer coming right off the heels of a brilliant fall.

We've already had our say regarding Balenciaga but unfortunately, we have been wounded yet again. We fell off our chairs raving about the Fall 2007 Prada collection. We loved the color, the freaky texture, just about everything about it. And then there was this:

What in the name of all things Laura Ingalls Wilder is going on with the florals this season? Yes, florals are touted as the "next big thing" for spring and yes, Prada's use is at the very least fairly sophisticated (if in a high-school English teacher sort of way). However, lets not make excuses here, is the deafening tones of the Native American flautist trio playing My Heart Will Go On in the subway station marginally better than the ramblings of the errant crackhead? Certainly, but is it the stuff of brilliance and great art? Surely not. Fancying ourselves as having our thumbs on the pulse of the everyman, we judge a great collection by the speed at which it appears on the shelves of Forever 21. We're not predicting the appearance of ankle length floral skirts anytime soon.

Brevity is the Soul of Wit...

2007-12-25T22:10:00.000-05:00

... and sometimes one has to speak fewer words to get a point across in the first place. Let's try it out here.

Holidays have socially-inherent color schemes by which, unless requested by the host or hostess, you are not required to abide when attending a holiday soiree. Even more to the point? Red does not automatically look good on just everyone... and if you're not sure about your own jaunts into the land of cherry, tomato and ruby, don't put on that oversized red puffy sweater!

There is no holiday festive enough to excuse our bleeding eyes.

Many thanks from the establishment, and to those for whom this applies, "Merry Christmas, everyone!"

Spiced Cider - Please Sir, May I Have Some More?

2007-12-24T11:18:00.000-05:00

Nowadays, it seems that no holiday party is complete without a certain item that, ironically, may only aid in not remembering the evening at all.

Greg Best and a recent issue of GQ provided what we found to be an amazingly flavored, wildly successful holiday beverage. What follows is the recipe, which we advise to drink happily, but afterwards, drive responsibly (Drunk driving? SO tacky.)...

Sinful Cider (serves 30-35)

Ingredients: 2-3 cinnamon sticks, a few whole cloves, a few peppercorns, 1 bottle (750 mL) small-batch bourbon, such as Maker's Mark or Wathen's, 1.5 gallons apple cider, 1/4 bottle angostura bitters, 1 pint heavy whipping cream, 1 teaspoon ground cinnamon, 1.5 teaspoons brown sugar

Drop cinnamon sticks, cloves, and peppercorns in the bottle of bourbon. Leave to steep for a couple of weeks (one week minimum). (Phat Tony NB: Since I wanted to maximize the flavors of the cinnamon, cloves and peppercorn in the beverage and I only had one week to steep the ingredients in the bourbon, I just threw another two cinnamon sticks, and a few more cloves and peppercorns in there... it worked perfectly.) On the day of the party, strain spirits and set aside. Pour apple cider and angostura bitters into a large stock pot. Place on stove and heat. While cider is heating, whip cream, then fold in ground cinnamon and brown sugar. When cider is hot, turn off heat and add the bourbon. Serve cider from the pot, still on the stove. Keep bowl of whipped cream on the counter and let guests help themselves.

Thanks again to Greg Best and GQ, and Happy Holidays to everyone from your Aesthetes at AQoT!

We Love the Deschanels

2007-12-23T02:01:00.000-05:00

We'd like to take this opportunity to sing the praises of two actresses whose quirky attitudes and classic looks add an essential ingredient to any project on which they endeavor.

Emily Deschanel features, other than in a host of bit roles in movies such as Spider Man 2 (how could we ever forget the role of Annoyed Office Front Desk Girl - although we're not sure that was her official title - when she held the pizza delivery boy, the tragically heroic Peter Parker, to the "Delivery within 30 minutes or the pizzas are FREE!" rule), as the lead character in "Bones," a show that to some may only be just another police investigation show, but to the Aesthetes, is a paragon of wit and mystery, unrivaled by the likes of CSI or NCIS (although Bets does have a certain affinity for NUMB3RS). In "Bones," Emily's character of "Temperence Brennan" not only dallies in the standard forensic drama fare, but also wades in an existential hodgepodge of the socially awkward and socially inappropriate. Loving that it's believable, even when she looks like this (I guess we'll have to believe that in order for that awkwardness to come from someplace honest, she clearly couldn't have peaked in high school):

And then there was Zooey. Zooey has arguably spent a great deal more time in the public eye, regardless of the artsy-weirdness, yet commercially successfulness (see The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, circa 2005) of her repertoire. Most recently seen in SciFi's Tin Man, we might not even care that neither her emotional state nor her vocal intonations waiver from one role to the next... we just love that she is who she is... although sure, the woven chainmail-esque top might need a touch of tailoring...

So kudos to the Deschanels... we simultaneously love and are bewildered by how you can be as quirky as you are, yet retain the luminous glow your apparently flawless genetic structure provides. We hope you show no signs of stopping as we ring in 2008!

We Love Wall Decals: v 2.0

2007-12-16T19:48:00.000-05:00

We love wall decals, no matter what the backlash in the general design community may be, we think they are practical and fun. We've noticed that some new and improved options have popped up recently.

We saw mirrored wall decals at Apartment Therapy: Europe and thought they looked light and airy if a bit feminine. (We'd try these on a chocolate brown or other dark colored wall to create balance).

Then we noticed 3D wall decals by Wallter:

And finally, the uber-kitchy and seasonally appropriate christmas tree decals which, we're sure, will not impart the same level of appropriate holiday cheer as Phat Tony's genuine faux tree but are nonetheless available for purchase here:

C is for Cookie

2007-12-15T19:47:00.000-05:00

Who could resist a good batch of cookies? Certainly not us we wholeheartedly assure you. We thought, befitting to the holiday spirit, that we might just share two of our favorite recipes.

The first is a crispy chocolate chocolate chip called "Korova Cookies" from a cookbook specializing in Parisian pastries. We find them just a bit more sophisticated than the classic chocolate chip and the perfect accompaniment to an afternoon cappuccino.

The second, a classic ginger molasses variety, is from a friend's mother we'll refer to as Mrs. Jetson and that we have taken the liberty to half because we think the quantities she suggested were meant to feed her entire small midwestern town.

Korova Cookies

1 1/4 cups flour
1/3 cups Dutch process cocoa (or just unsweetened cocoa)
1/2 tsp baking soda
1 stick plus 3 tbsp unsalted butter (room temperature)
2/3 cups packed light brown sugar
1/4 cup granulated sugar
1/2 tsp fine sea salt
1 tsp pure vanilla extract
5 oz bittersweet chocolate, chopped into chip-size bits

Sift the flour, cocoa and baking soda together. Cream the butter either by hand or in the mixer and then add both sugars and vanilla and beat for another minute or two. Mix in the dry ingredients only until incorporated and the dough is crumbly. Toss in the chocolate pieces and mix only to incorporate. Try not to handle the dough too much once the flour is mixed in.

Turn the dough out onto a smooth work surface, divide in half and, working with one half at a time, shape the dough into a log about 1 1/2 inches in diameter. Wrap the logs in plastic wrap and chill them for at least 1 hour.

Preheat oven to 350 and on a baking sheet lined with parchment paper bake one sheet at a time for 12 minutes. Please note: These cookies are drier than most which is part of their novelty. Don't worry if they look like they aren't done when you remove them from the oven and make sure to cool them on a wire rack until they are close to room temperature.

Ginger Molasses

Cream:
1/2 lb butter
1/4 tbsp salt
1 1/2 cups sugar
2 medium sized eggs
3/8 cup molasses (add 1/4 cup water)

Sift:
3 1/2 cups flour
1/2 tbsp baking soda
1/2 tbsp cinnamon
3/4 tbsp ground cloves
1/2 tbsp ground ginger

Mix wet and dry ingredients together. Cover and refrigerate overnight.

Roll dough into walnut sized balls, roll the balls in some sugar (just sprinkle some on a plate) think of it like salting a margarita glass...except...not really. Bake at 350 for about 13-15 minutes and enjoy.

Weighing in: Ethno-scarves

2007-12-13T19:15:00.001-05:00

The pseudo-ethnic print scarf has taken over...Manhattan at least. Can anyone confirm or deny its use in other locations, we're curious? Regardless, whether we like it or not, it's this year's pashmina and it looks like it's going to be around at least for a season. We knew something was up when the Keffiyeh was the new ho t item this summer and we've struggled with the concept of women running around the city wearing what has looked to us, rather like a babushka. We've changed our minds recently having seen it worn the right way exactly twice. Once by a very stylish close friend.

And once by our favorite twin.

We're not even going to bother enumerating the rules this time. We just leave you with the notion that if you're wondering if the word babushka applies to you...step away from the scarf. Thank you.

Dear Stylist: Brit Brit Edition

2007-12-05T22:49:00.000-05:00

Dear Stylist,

Exactly how many printed hoodies does 100 million dollars buy one?

Just checking.

Yours truly,

The Aesthetes

The Wardrobe That Time Forgot

2007-12-04T21:48:00.002-05:00

We know we're not the only ones to notice a particular emerging trend and certainly not the first to comment, but we've come to the point where we can't quite leave the issue alone. Has anyone else wondered what spurred the return of the long belted cardigan? Remember these?

Perhaps you or someone you know even owned one back when a Democrat ruled the White House and Cher "BE-lieved in life after love, after love, after love, after love..." I mean, sure, they were comfy...but stylish? Maybe in that "I grew up in Long Island but go to college in the Midwest" sort of way. And by "that," we mean not stylish at all. And by "not stylish at all," we mean not worthy of a comeback after spending 3 years or less in the back of our closets (Good call, Tracy... Ms. Talbots, if you're nasty). Quality nostalgia and/or whimsy do not happen that quickly see: Sex and the City movie for reference.

When we started seeing these garments out and about again recently we thought, surely this is a bad flashback come to haunt us and these people just completed the mother of all closet reorganizations and have trotted out one final nostalgic (sic) item before the Salvation Army is due to pick up the wardrobe that time forgot.

We thought that right up until we were paging through last month's French Vogue and we came across A WHOLE SPREAD ON THE LONG BELTED CARDIGAN (dubbed "cardi" via Tracy). This trend, we're afraid, may be back and in serious danger of swallowing Ellen Pompeo alive.

Judging Project Runway a.k.a. It's Funny Because It's True

2007-11-27T23:49:00.000-05:00

We love Project Runway. We've always loved Project Runway. Ever since Jay McCarroll gave hope to every big-boned awkward cast-out who always thought they were relegated to stage crew and never stardom (a lesser known variant of "always a bridesmaid, never a bride"), we've trusted in the PR credo of finding the next great American designer. We still do.

But outside of the talent-related qualities of this new group of designers, we've started to question... well, the taste level of this motley crew with respect to everything else...

First of all, let it be known that each of their respective achievements cannot be overstated. All of these designers were chosen for a reason. They know what they're doing. Yay Carmen Chris Christian Elisa Jack Jillian Kevin Kit Marion Rami Ricky Simone Steven Sweet P and Victorya. That's coming from the heart. Love you, mean it. That being said...

Jack. If you over-extend your arms over your head ONE MORE TIME... well, I can't really make any threats, I'm just saying it's a bad idea. You're teetering on the edge of mid-90's circuit queen. That look is over, and if you need more convincing, may we refer you to the wisdom of... well... us.

Kit. We're hoping that you're this season's Alison Kelly, except without the unfortunate recycling challenge incident. You also might want to lose the hairbow. Or not. Your choice.

Sweet P. Thank you for clearly being good at construction. Now could you do us a favor and maybe take us on a tour through your portfolio? And of course, by portfolio, we mean tattoos. Thanks.

Carmen. We're sure it makes complete sense to you why a designer doesn't really know what they're doing unless they've been a model. Okay, let's say, for (absolutely asinine) argument's sake, that your opinion is valid. We're just going to say that humanity's ability to adapt to difficulties in their environment has been well documented. I understand this is a bit of a stretch, but we tend to think that the concept of evolution and the ability for human beings (and maybe living things, in general, regardless of phylum) to adapt allows us to infer that maybe, just maybe, a few of those individuals NOT six feet tall, with high cheekbones, perfect skin, and/or an indelible desire to model clothing while adeptly performing the walk-walk-walk-half turn-half turn-walk-walk-walk-half turn-full turn-walk-walk-walk-walk-walk maneuver, may have found the ability to become great designers. But you don't have to believe me... Believe Michael Kors, the fashion-world's answer to Dr. Phil. Not pretty.

Jillian. We don't get you. We also have no idea if you can create anything other than that short flared skirt thing you keep making... and wearing. It's an awkward niche to be in. And no, not awkward interesting, but awkward huh?

Kevin. Could you do something more exciting? I mean, the most exciting thing so far is that you're not gay. Seriously? That's your defining feature? Happy day, you're straight, good times. Now what? Oh wait, that's right, you design jeans, and one of said designs was featured on the cover of a Victoria's Secret catalogue. Okay, that's something. We still need more. Just saying.

Christian. You're quirky. Not interesting. There's a difference. Maybe you'll learn that once you turn 22.

Chris. Looking at you, we just feel like there's something to superficially mock. Perhaps your refusal to run. Perhaps your inability to complete sentences when with SJP. But whatever man, you've sort of proven that you aim to do your damn thing on this show.

Elisa. You were so lucky to be paired with Sweet P on last week's episode. Your ideas are sound, but your methods of cleaning and completing are a bit junky. Don't get too comfortable... you're not always going to have your fellow competitors ironing the crappiness out of your designs. Oh, and as a special request, don't spit on our outfits. It's a tad nasty.

Steven. So you have a personality, right? We thought we caught a bit of it during the PR previews... Your craftmanship is good, but we wish we could remember what you looked like. Thank god for BravoTV.com.

Ricky. Stop crying. It's pathetic. You've successfully dragged us kicking and screaming from the point of "in touch with his feelings" to "whiny little bitch." You don't deserve that, as a person, we understand, but stop giving us so much fodder. We also already know that you were a lingerie designer. You're starting to get close to Emmett (previous PR contestant) who repeated weekly that he was a menswear designer. At the end of the day, you're here, stop thinking that the lack of variety in your CV is a crutch. Excuses are gross, you heard it here first.

Simone and Marion. You're gone now, so we'll spare our unkind, however true, words... this time.

And as for you two, Rami and Victorya... Stay cool, KIT, BFF 4 E and E, have a great summer, loved those great times in History class, you're the best.

F-ugg-ly

2007-11-27T22:02:00.000-05:00

Alright, we get it, its officially fall/winter, its cold, and people need to keep their respective appendages out of the elements. We've seen the Ugg, we've pretty much made peace with the concept and we don't have a problem with the classic version as utilitarian footwear.

That being said, there are several versions out there to which we do take offense. There's the patchwork Ugg, the pom-pom Ugg and the dreaded sequined Ugg to name a few. We happened to be back in the midwest over the Thanksgiving holiday and we saw several versions of what can only be described as another huge flaming mistake.

What in the name of muppet feet is going on here?

Is there any reason you've decided that your calf/ankle/foot region should resemble that of a clydesdale? We do not care how warm and snuggly said footwear may be, you were not just cast in your local production of Sesame Street "Live" or "On Ice" for that matter.

Hello, the midwest, are you listening? We need you to stop it. Right now. Thank you.

The Ballad of Justin Bobby

2007-11-26T22:53:00.002-05:00

Dear MTV,

Thank you for sending Justin Bobby into our otherwise uneventful lives. Instead of spending Monday nights with our New York Magazine crossword puzzles and a big mug of chamomile tea we can now relive every bad relationship we've ever had. No seriously, we're thrilled that you've unearthed someone simultaneously so evil and ridiculous that we throw up a little bit every time he enters the scene.

Does Audrina's "I'm done" signal the end of Justin Bobby's reign? We're a little sad we won't be seeing him anymore because with the recent transition from hipster beanie and man-capris to full bedouin headscarf, we were just counting down the episodes before he sported a space helmet and a poncho.

We truly enjoyed deciphering his conversations with Audrina:

"Why don't we just kick rocks and truth and time will tell all" = "I kinda sorta like being on TV."

"I don't want it to go down like this" = "Wait a minute, I love being on TV please don't go girl."

We applaud this casting of a villain so powerful that we can only suggest that you cast Johnny Depp as Justin Bobby in "The Hills: The Movie" which we're sure is already in pre-production talks. (As an aside we like Christine Taylor for LC and Matthew Fox for Brody Jenner).

We'd like to point out that we called the inevitable demise of the relationship from day one and although we fear this may be too much to ask, perhaps Audrina really has seen the light and ushered this clown out of her life for good.

If so....we'll miss you Justin Bobby.

Yours truly,

The Aesthetes

Sorry Ash, But We've Already Picked Our Favorite Twin

2007-11-25T13:39:00.001-05:00

Hi, Mary Kate? So remember when we poked fun at a couple of your key fashion choices? We also may have made one or two thin jokes? Yeah...um...awkward...because deep down we really sort of love you.

There are very few true living fashion icons out there. Discounting those who dress themselves with the help of a capable stylist and those who put themselves together quite nicely but without any risk-taking, there are only one or two people worth mentioning. Kate Moss comes to mind as she embodies a palpable "signature style" copied by celebrities, regular folks and most recently pumped out to the masses in the form of Kate Moss by Topshop. We also have recently taken notice of Carine Roitfeld (check out Angie's profile of her at My Fashion Life). Roitfeld recently made headlines with this crazy futuristic coat:

Is it a bit strange? Yes. Is it also brilliant? We think so.

Mary Kate Olsen is the only American that we find both fascinating and disturbing enough to capture our attention to the same level as the aforementioned women. Do we feel conflicted about her sometimes? Definitely. While MK's fashion tastes almost always tend to be un peu difficile to stomach for the masses, even we questioned her sojourn into "Derelicte" dressing during her brief stint in higher education.

Since then however, we find her choices just interesting enough.

We love the red carpet vintage looks.

The menswear looks

The all black popped with something unexpected look

Finally, our personal favorite, the "I can pile on a whole heap of crazy and still look good look"

We read recently that Mary Kate's fashion role models are almost always men because they dress solely for themselves. That statement really resonated with us because it is not to say that you have given up fashion and aesthetic ideals, it is just that you are working solely for your own opinions and have permanently disconnected from the reigning fashion media. She's out there but she's also fashion forward in a real sense and we can't help admiring that.

Nixon - Less Watergate, More Watch

2007-11-22T11:00:00.001-05:00

Purveyors of style and trends that we are, we are sometimes shocked, year to year, by the lack of variety in certain realms of fashion. While this has constantly been an issue in the area of men's winter coats (Peacoat? Check. Parka with removal insert? Check. Bomber jacket, whether down or other variety? Check. Same options, annually, for the past decade. Next?), we understood, as winter coats are a staple and tend to run on the expensive side of things... therefore, not necessarily an item one would want to throw out every spring.

That being said, we have always had higher hopes for accessories. Accessories, to state this in the most obvious way, are little touches by which one can assert his or her own style and point of view. Why then, we ask, is there so little variety in what current trends deem as the best men's watches out there? Having seen between 5 and 10 magazine spreads on men's watches, we're struck by how... monotonous they tend to be. This is why Nixon, a watch brand displayed off-runway by the stars of skate, surf and snow, is such a refreshing sight.

While formulating a new eccentricity when it comes to telling time, we find the innovation and simplicity of Nixon's styling a welcome change. We, of course, appreciate the ability to simultaneously figure out what time it is in 10 different time zones, operate a stopwatch, and handle some long-division, all from the comfort of our own respective wrists, but we'd rather save that space for something that has a little more form and a little less function.

Betsy Addendum:
Admittedly, I've been trying to copy Phat Tony's style since the early days at McDowell School of Dance where I deeply coveted his pas-de-bouree-petit-jete. The recent call out on the wonders of the nixon watch being hardly any exception, I was struck by a theme. It seems that lacquered wood in unexpected places is a surprisingly effective design element right now.

Take for example this Furni Gator alarm clock:

We have been obsessed with this item for a few years now having seen several similar designs on the market. We realize now that it is the wood element that lends the clean lines and brings us another modern take on a natural element for the home. Love it.

We Love Project Runway: Ep. 1

2007-11-14T23:45:00.001-05:00

Clearly the Aesthetes adore Project Runway. What's not to love with Tim Gunn, the ridiculous challenges, Heidi Klum's syntax, Nick Verreos, Jay McIntyre, Santino... We have been awaiting this latest season with much excitement. We feel like we've been reunited with a long lost love and not surprisingly we have an observation or three about the first episode.

Observations

Victorya's dress was the cutest from a "what people are willing to wear right now" perspective.

Chris and Jack could be interesting wild cards even though they didn't elicit much attention from the panel this week.

Where did Ricky get his amazing collection of hats that should belong to the Village People?

Intensely Hilarious Quotes

"People can be fantastic designers but if you haven't modeled you don't know the first thing" - Carmen

"That flower is so M.O.B." - Michael Kors (because we had been using the phrase Mother of the Bride SO much lately that we were DYING for an acronym).

Predictions

Rami will function as this season's Kara Saun and will repeat the pretty yet pedestrian toga garment ad infinitum.

Simone represents the first of many designers who will be Auf'd in favor of Elisa who has been specifically cast to bring the crazy this season.

We will be watching.

L is for My-God-This-Show-Is-Amazing.

2007-11-12T16:14:00.001-05:00

So, as un-chic as this pronouncement is, I just have to let it out.

I love TV.

I do. I can't help it. Now that the words DVR, Netflix and Samsung 720p Flat Panel LCD HDTV have entered both mine and Betsy's lexicon, it can occasionally be hard to find an excuse to leave the apartment. And while we would both love to be those people that focus their living room furniture around a fresh citrus arrangement or a functional AND aesthetically pleasing wood, ceramic or natural steel sculpture, we tend to fall prey to moving pictures. My bad.

However, this is not all bad. In the context of this blog, it can be useful. One ridiculously fantastic example of this is The L-Word.

If you haven't heard of this Showtime series, you might still be trying to dig out from under than rock that has blotted out the sun on your planet for the past 4 years. But even if you HAVE heard about it, you may have never seen it. Let us tell you, it's never too late. Again... there's Netflix.

The fodder for AQoT on this series is virtually infinite... from food to fashion to design, there's so much to say, and more importantly, much more to learn.

In an effort to avoid writing a book on the subject, let's just talk about Jennifer Beals' character, Bette Porter. (Oh yeah, in case you were wondering what happened to J. Beals after Flashdance... now you know.)

Okay, so she's a self-righteous bitch. Whatever. Once we come to terms with that, we realize that Bette is a paragon of style and taste. She has been rocking the styles that we have come to admire, and she was doing it years before we even knew it was a good idea. She's a contemporary museum director turned art school dean, so she surrounds herself in smart, cutting-edge design, without falling into the hole of modern, attractive, but painfully pedestrian choices (maybe one day we'll talk about the Eames chair and ottoman). While with all the sharp edges, her house might be a deathtrap for her daughter, Angelica, her design aesthetic is impeccable. As for fashion, she does the power-lesbian thing like she was born to do it... which I suppose she was. The secretary blouse (in all positive, and no tragic frumpy versions) has been a part of her wardrobe for the past two seasons. The Jil Sander suit she wore throughout seasons one and two was paired with a variety of classic and cutting edge tops and accessories, testifying to the versatility of a classic wardrobe stable.

Good moves, Bette, that's all we're saying.

The Skin-ny

2007-11-10T23:04:00.002-05:00

It seems as if leather has popped up as a trend these days. Clearly we’re far beyond the leather jacket, which though oft misused, is nonetheless an American staple. We’re not just talking about the fits like a glove and still nonexistent pair of leather pants we’ve coveted since we were 15 and have yet to discover in actual existence. We’re talking leather skirts (the Olsen twins strike again)

and several leather dresses we’ve seen at the "cheap & chic "chains like Zara and H&M.

On preliminary examination, this trend will be fleeting with high dry cleaning bills and a lack of breathability. We’re also a bit concerned that this whole faux-rocker thing has gone a bit too far (penchants for guitar hero notwithstanding). Faux-rocker to the Aesthetes is Ashlee Simpson, Uncle Jesse from Full House, and Justin Bobby. Actually nothing says faux rocker better than Justin Bobby in a full-on signature Justin Bobby beanie.

Faux Royalty Looks Great On Jonathan Rhys Meyers

2007-11-10T22:30:00.001-05:00

Before The Tudors, Mr. Rhys Meyers (Mr. Meyers? Mr. J.R. Meyers? Eh, let's go with J.R.) had amassed an impressive performance CV... but other than Velvet Goldmine and Bend It Like Beckham, we were hard-pressed to sing the appropriately specified praises of this actor. Then came The Tudors, and everything changed. His face was instantly recognizable, a quality not lost on the fashion industry, not to mention every postered surface in New York City.

We don't know about you, but in the past, J.R. seemed a bit manorexic. While the gaunt and vapid thing may have temporarily worked for Kate Moss and Mary Kate, it never worked for you. Your recent project didn't necessarily force burgers down your throat, but it created a context for the body type that was less stylish, more skeletal. One thing the Tudors were good at... staying warm with layers... and if putting a layer of linen under a layer of cotton under a layer of animal skin under a layer of crushed velvet is what works for you, then amen. You don't have the weight issue that Henry VIII is chronicled in paintings as having, and luckily, it doesn't seem like you have a sweating issue.

So while your past is a bit gaussian blur for us, we're thrilled that a career move finally matched the one look you have. If pseudo-oppressive heirarchies and fashion-forward Renaissance-wear is your thing, that's just fine with us because, J.R., faux royalty looks great on you.

Dear Stylist: Roadkill Edition

2007-11-05T20:39:00.001-05:00

Dear Stylist,

When will you fail to amaze us with your questionable choices? We realize that Kate Bosworth and Zhang Ziyi recently attended some sort of soiree in China and perhaps there are some deviating cultural norms at play here but seriously, what is that Chinchilla? Did you not notice that Ms. Ziyi looks like she's actually holding the dead animal she just skinned to fashion this garment? Ms. Bosworth looks like a late edition Cruella De Vil and if one wants to model themselves after a Disney character, we suggest Esmeralda, she really knew how to work the peasant blouse trend.

We're not really politically anti-fur here, we just think it looks gross 9 out of 10 times. Take for example Britney Spears. Does she not look like she skinned her little dog Bit-Bit and is wearing her as a shrug.

Perhaps there's ways to wear fur, in fact, there are certain people who may be able pull it off:

1. Sarah Jessica Parker circa SATC seasons 1 and 2 because there was a time when she could pull off that sense of whimsical risk taking.

2. Nicole Kidman because she's just regal and Nordic-looking enough to accessorize a fur coat with a nice viking helmet.

3. Mary Kate Olsen because the poor little thing looks just about cold enough to drape anything over her bony little shoulders.

Aside from the above mentioned we ask you to please refrain from this growing and disturbing use of fur.

Yours truly,

The Aesthetes

A Doomed Spinoff Looks Great on Kate Walsh

2007-11-04T18:35:00.002-05:00

We generally love Grey's Anatomy. We love the bad acting, the ridiculous plotlines, McWhatever. We thought we'd love Addison Montgomery Shepherd's spinoff series Private Practice. And secretly, we do but we're also predicting its imminent demise, mostly due to the presence of Taye Diggs.

However, Kate Walsh looks amazing lately. Amazing.

Bravo Kate for uncovering the perfect black pants. This outfit screams ideal proportions and we love the use of the red shoe. A red shoe is not an easy accessory, in fact, we're going to issue a please don't try this at home on that one.

In another example of a woman who really knows how to pick the right shoe, note the above almost nude pair. We think this is modern and sleek as well as a great match with the leather jacket and feminine dress. Ms. Walsh looks much younger than her 40 years and has come a long way from her one CSI guest appearance as a transvestite.

So what if private practice won't be to Grey's Anatomy what A Different World was to the Cosby Show. Ms. Walsh, you can rest easy that you will eventually be able to join the Rachel Bilson I'm hotter than my other unemployed former co-stars club because a doomed spinoff looks great on you.

Shake It Off Hilary Don't Be So Yesterday

2007-11-04T18:14:00.001-05:00

We've noticed a disturbing trend. It seems like Hilary Duff is a diva in training. A very specific diva in training.

If someone told us we were going to morph into Mariah Carey we'd start making some serious life changes faster than you can say box office opening weekend of Glitter.

We Love Mustard

2007-10-28T17:18:00.001-04:00

Of all the "new" colors out there for fall, the one we're feeling most in synch with right now is mustard. We've noticed we're liking neutrals as always, as well as most of the saturated colors but not the neon-bright colors the GAP is trying to push on us right now. With a quick nod to runner-up cayenne, we're pegging mustard as our favorite fall color.

This color works with just about every other color we can think of from black, to gray to all the colors in the latest Prada ads. P.S. Isn't their use of color this season brilliant?

Mustard happens much easier to wear than orange or yellow, more interesting than red and unlike say a fun turquoise, actually feels like fall.

Uniformity

2007-10-28T16:00:00.001-04:00

We've been doing a lot of thinking lately about various grand, overarching themes with regard to the topic of dressing oneself. I think we can all understand and agree that far beyond just the practicalities of wearing garments, one's clothes are always, whether one likes it or not, communicating with the world. As daunting as that may be, it is a reality and facing such, we've come to believe in certain strategies that make life easier and certainly more aesthetically pleasing.

Does anyone else subscribe to the value of a personal uniform? If t-shirt and jeans springs to mind yes, that's sort of what we're talking about but unfortunately while that is a uniform it's not, barring James Dean, personal. We're looking for a signature look rather than a look that says "hipster" or "investment banker." It doesn't have to be groundbreaking but it does have to be specific. Karl Lagerfeld and Coco Chanel spring to mind.

Of course, this concept can stretch outside the realm of fashion. It definitely includes haircuts. Think the Anna Wintour bob, this woman cut her hair that way in the 70s and it still somehow looks fresh today. We're impressed. We think red lipstick falls in this category. Really anything appearance-related that can stand the test of time, looks good, and becomes a portion of one's identity qualifies.

We haven't quite defined our version of the personal uniform yet but we are continually adopting and refining the principles of simplify, edit, and streamline.

The Secretary Blouse

2007-10-24T09:08:00.001-04:00

It's late October and we're knee deep into the season of pumpkins, cider donuts and football but does anyone else feel like it's the endless summer? Not that we're complaining, it's just that every time we try to wear our puffy vests we find ourselves breaking a sweat and we LOVE our puffy vests.

If you're one for fashion magazines, surely you've noticed that editors are screaming about the "secretary" trend for fall. Admittedly, we support the return of lady-like in women's fashion, for example we've always been a sucker for a good 1950's vintage day dress but what of this specific trend, and what of it's mascot, the secretary blouse?

We can't seem to shop anywhere lately without coming across something like this.

Why hello frumpy, what's your name? Prim and proper is one thing but attack of the hand-eating blouse is clearly another. We're finding this ultra literal translation of this trend quite a bit boring and another fabulous example of how to be a fashion victim.

Options abound for adopting a hint of this trend and giving yourself the option for wearing the garment next year. Several favorites below:

Banana Republic Satin Ribbon Top: $78

Just the black and white kicks it up a notch and makes the whole look more youthful.

Anthropologie Alameda Top: $59
More contemporary drape, nice sleeve detail. Would be great with a pencil skirt and some crazy heels.

J Crew Rivoli Blouse: $115

Not quite the traditional shape at all but definitely hinting towards that YSL ovoid silhouette that folks are loving right now.

Finally, we think the most brilliant way of capturing this trend in a semi-literal manner is with a sleeveless secretary blouse a la Natalie Portman's costume in Wes Anderson's short film Hotel Chevalier. We think that if you choose to go with the flouncy tie neck or any sort of ruffle, it is imperative to also impart a sense of long and lean. The sleeveless shirt lends a beautiful columnar aspect to an outfit especially when paired with a wide-leg trouser and high heeled boot.

We can't find an image of it online but you can download the short film for free here.

Baby Weight Looks Great on Nicole Richie

2007-10-23T10:34:00.001-04:00

No matter what the tabloids say this particular month, it seems like there is ALWAYS a celebrity that could direly use some help from a pre-Gilmore Girls peak "Save the Children" Sally Struthers. Ahem, Mary Kate, you're still invited to our barbecue and Phat Tony just threw your double cheeseburger on the grill.

Its should come as no surprise then that we avoided all guilty pleasure media for the months surrounding the peak of Nicole Richie's "I don't have an eating disorder" problem.

I mean, bikini bottoms should not be baggy, that's so gross and it's enough to send us straight for a big steaming pot of fettuccine alfredo and let's just say we don't really need that kind of encouragement. But lately, thanks to Joel Madden weaving his magic spell of impregnation, our little Ms. Richie looks fabulous.

I think I see muscle tone and those are definitely curves. Might she even be succumbing to a hint of a smile?

We're not really sure how she's going to keep this up post birth unless she's already purchased her tickets to the Britney Spears "how to become the physical embodiment of Cheetos" seminar. Needless to say we're a little concerned but for now Nicole Richie, its time for seconds because baby weight looks great on you.

Dear Stylist: Balenciaga Edition

2007-10-22T10:03:00.000-04:00

Dear Stylist,

Ok, this is a shame. We think Balenciaga fell off the rails this season. We're pretty sure this isn't Jennifer Connelly's fault.

Yes, we were madly in love with Fall 2007 and then found that the Spring 2008 offering from Nicolas Ghesquiere pained us too deeply for to speak of most of the time. But seriously stylist, think before you blindly follow a supposed genius. This is what fashion victims are made of.

Yours truly,

The Aesthetes

Wall Flats

2007-10-21T11:34:00.000-04:00

We became obsessed with all things Inhabit Living a few years ago when we discovered their great selection of pillows and bedding which we find on trend but not over the top. Lately our fascination for texture has brought us back to the one element we have yet to try, wall flats.

These embossed square panels are made out of bamboo-pulp which has a growing reputation for being an environmentally sustainable material. Like wall decals, wall flats are removable but not reusable. We think adding a white on white textural element feels very modern and is a great option for hiding a poorly textured wall or just for adding surface interest for a minimal investment.

This product is available in 18'x18' squares and comes 10 panels per box at $86. We're waiting for a wider selection of patterns to open up before trying this out ourselves. But for anyone thinking about checking it out but wanting to try a little preview before committing, Inhabit sells 1 tile samples as well as a sample pack of all their designs. We think this overall concept is great. It reminds us of FLOR, but more on that later.

These Kids Nowadays...

2007-10-20T15:10:00.001-04:00

So Bets and I were taking an afternoon stroll through the park (oh, and just so you know, the Dalai Lama is out in full force. He's so hot right now. Folks were loving him today... and passing out cookies.), bubble tea in hand, and we couldn't help but notice the fashion-forward kids all around town. Okay, first thing's first, sometimes their parents could learn a thing or two from them. Second, I wondered how fashion-forward kids in the Midwest were socially appropriated by their peers. I turned to Bets, as she is a constant source of reality at times like these, and posited the inquiry her way. Looking exfoliated and carefree as she does on a day like this, she blinked twice and said, "I think they were just nerds. But they're also the kids who grow up, then look back on their past and realize they were just with it."

Truth.

In light of this, we began thinking about tips we can pick up from these in vogue youngsters.

Tip #1: Don't steer clear of interesting eyewear.

Growing up with vision issues can be kid's nightmare, but those who know better pull it off with style and grace. It's also a purchase that parents (the nice ones, at least) allow their kids to have at least a little of input on. So take a page out of these parents' stylebook, and get a pair that tells the people around you about more than your crazy astigmatism... Purchasing eyewear is a great way to express yourself without feeling like you're throwing away money on an outfit you may never find an excuse to wear. Think Oliver Peoples. Think Prodesign:Denmark. Don't think $99-and-under rack at LensCrafters. Two quick addendums, though: (a) listen to the person behind the eyeglasses counter, for they tend to know the shape of glasses that work with your face. They know more about this sort of thing than you do, it's what they do. (b) The combination of great designers and best selling literature does not make for great eyewear. Enter the round Harry Potter glasses. People, have we forgotten that Harry is a fictional character? Is Mary GrandPre really supposed to be a style icon? Not since Gandhi has anyone been able to rock these glasses. Take the hint.

Tip #2: Don't be afraid to layer, especially when circumstances require it

Kids are forced daily to run the gamut of environments: from chilly early mornings at bus stops to stagnant classrooms with invariably crappy climate control to rank school gymnasiums to stifling hot buses to what we can only hope to be a regulated climate in their own homes. Kids are forced to be ready, clothing-wise, for every eventuality, and those fashion-forward kids tend to do so with style. Basic rule: Layer is encouraged, but don't put anything on your body that you would be ashamed to wear on its own. Simple, but a rule that tends to be ignored by most. Let's see, what are we trying to say here?... Ummm... oh right, this is it: Guys, you can afford another white undershirt.

Tip #3: There's a difference between whimsy and ridiculous.

Whimsy = good. Ridiculous = bad.

This is perhaps the most difficult to grasp if you haven't thought about it before. Whimsy implies confidence, a sense of humor and wit. Ridiculous implies that your parents dress you because if they didn't, you might actually look worse. Whimsy is effortless. Ridiculous looks contrived.

Let's put this another way, this time in a way New Yorkers can't ignore... it has been everywhere the past decade, nowadays more than ever. If you haven't run into a Sex and the City film crew on your way around NYC, then you arguably haven't left your apartment recently. Unfortunately, the new movie provides an ideal example:

Patricia Field (SATC stylist) has been historically daring, but she might've taken a brief, somewhat unfortunate, detour recently...

Carrie, circa 2003:
Carrie, circa now:

If we need to say more about these images... well, you should get out more.

Toga! Toga! Toga!

2007-10-08T20:13:00.001-04:00

Something's afoot in Hollywood and that something is more mysterious than the last David Lynch film. Starlets are parading around in a very special mix of John Belushi's Animal House Toga and Joseph's Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat.

Right, so Cate Blanchett can be a little edgy, what with films such as The Talented Mr. Ripley, Notes On A Scandal, and every movie ever made about Elizabethan times. So sure, we'll just chalk this one up to an off the shoulder column of a dress in which this turquoise is flattering and she's carrying around just enough, I realize I'm wearing a bedsheet chutzpah.

But in what world do Mischa Barton and Courtney Love meet up for Pinkberry and then shop for matching ensembles of crazy? We speculate that perhaps these two were shot in these getups sometime around fashion week and thus may be some sort of trend/practical joke as played by a designer who's done way too many drugs.

And if that's the case, we have our suspicions of who just might be that designer's muse...

Weighing In: Stirrup Pants

2007-10-05T14:40:00.000-04:00

from: "betsy" [betsareoff@AQoT.com]
sent: Thu 10/4/2007 7:46pm
reply-to: betsareoff@AQoT.com
to: "phat tony" [phatty@AQoT.com]
cc:
subject: Armageddon (and not the movie)
attachments: img

Dammit I'm at Bloomingdale's and they're going to force me to write about stirrup pants.

-b.

from: "phat tony" [phatty@AQoT.com]
sent: Thu 10/4/2007 7:52pm
reply-to: phatty@AQoT.com
to: "betsy" [betsareoff@AQoT.com]
cc:
subject: RE: Armageddon (and not the movie)

Oh jesus... next thing you're going to tell me is that they have a
huge display with wooden jewelry and applique holiday sweaters... I
mean, how much more "elementary school teacher" can you get?

from: "betsy" [betsareoff@AQoT.com]
sent: Thu 10/4/2007 8:01pm
reply-to: betsareoff@AQoT.com
to: "phat tony" [phatty@AQoT.com]
cc:
subject: RE: RE:Armageddon (and not the movie)

Not quite but they've chosen to display said pants alongside an assortment
of short-sleeved turtlenecks. It feels like 1988 in here I'm getting itchy,
I have to go.