Celebrity Time Machine

We just had a chat with our crystal ball and it told us what Fergie Ferg is going to look like in 20 years.

Like the twin sister of Third Rock from the Sun's Kristen Johnston.

Don't say we didn't warn you.

Affordable Art Part Deux

We have a confession to make. While we like to think we share our opinions and also our finds with the world oftentimes when we find something we really like we might sometimes have the tendency to keep it to ourselves. We've seen one too many great restaurants and hip hop lounges become overrun by recently moved to the city investment bankers or other Long Islanders. Call us smug, elitists if you will, we like to think of it as protective. Unsurprisingly, when we wrote about affordable art we sort of neglected to mention one of our longtime favorites: Antigirl. We love these prints by Tiphanie Brooke which are super affordable ($45) a great size for framing (18x24) and easy to mix and match and create a larger piece by hanging two (diptych) or three (triptych) together.


Check out a more expanded selection of works here.

Dear Stylist: Jumpsuit Edition

Dear The Fabulous Ms. Keys,



Alicia, darling, honey, sweetie, there are far more flattering options out there, seriously, just right around the corner, if you would just step this way, we promise no one will get hurt. May we please introduce you to the fun and fabulous world of separates?

Yours truly,

The Aesthetes

Ode to the Woman on the Subway: a Haiku

Mauve and purple don't

go together not even

if both in the scarf.

*****A note to those not appreciating the haiku genre: Phat Tony assured me and consequently assures all of you that Haikus are always funny. Always.

We Love Neil Patrick Harris

We all need role models and who better than the original blogger himself, Doogie Howser, M.D. Doogie, in all his precocious glory, was at the helm of one of the best of the "lost" sitcoms of the 80s i.e. one's that were not beaten to death by the syndication horse. Really, what's not to love, a 16 year old doctor who actually has compassion and a sense of humor and only mildly grazes the lovable end of the nerd spectrum.

Can you say suspension of disbelief?


Dr. Douglas Howser was adeptly played by Neil Patrick Harris whom we have grown to love more and more over the years.


Clearly Mr. Patrick Harris has grown into a healthy sense of style (and hair products) and has made said transition remarkably better than his peers (see: Fred Savage). He's made such a reasonably smooth transition in the world of celebrity and child stardom even in the face of such obstacles such as coming out and self parody (although the cameo in Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle was hilarious), it has come to the point that whenever we get stuck, we the aesthetes, always ask ourselves what would Neil Patrick Harris do (WWNPHD)? Certainly, this catchy acronym is a clear adaptation of the much more common WWTBFCD (what would the Barefoot Contessa Do)? Look out for WWNPHD bracelets and t-shirts coming soon to a mall near you.

Phat Tony Addendum: We wish that any sort of recent appearances he has made on the world's stage (anything having to do with "How I Met Your Mother," coming out of the closet, etc.) actually improved our opinion of him... However, combine his Doogie beginnings with his Christina Aguilera-esque vocal riffing-con-finger jiggle in "Undercover Brother," and he has already reached a zenith that is virtually uncalled for in the magical world of AQoT. WWNPHD, indeed...

After School Special: AQoT Edition

Ah childhood...Rice Krispies Treats, Capture the Flag, You Can't Do That on Television...those were simpler times. Unfortunately, our inevitable aging has left us prone to sigh's of "kids nowadays..." as we are confronted with that which we do not understand, Ne-Yo, Gossip Girl, The Hills, Justin Timberlake. Ha, just kidding, we totally understand that stuff. What we don't understand lately is what is going on with the next generation (are we at Z yet?) of budding superstars.

Let's start with Vanessa Hudgens. Fine, she took some pictures of herself naked and in the grand scheme of things we're not going to go all Republican on you and say that this is an immoral thing to do we're just saying, did no one explain to her how the Internet works?

And then there's Jamie Lynn Spears. Sure, Britney has made some bad choices that $100 million should be able to prevent one from making, but at least she had the decency to wait until she was in her 20s to have a baby by her totally not famous boyfriend. Shockingly, Nickelodeon seems not to have a problem with the situation. We wonder if they'll try to cover up Zoey 101's baby bump with strategically placed grocery bags a la Claire Huxtable in the 80s.

Apparently, Lily Allen is also pregnant. While not in her teens, she's also not too far removed and she was recently asked to design a line of maternity clothing specifically intended for juniors, like Delia's juniors, otherwise known as girls in their teens and VERY early 20s. In what universe is that a good idea? The least we can do is force girls to wear ugly florals and stirrup pants through their pregnancy as a deterrent.

We've come to the point where we fully expect the next breaking news item on CNN to be Miley Cyrus' gruesome killing spree.

What have we learned here kids, naked photos and pregnancy will not actually harm one's chances of a lucrative future in Children's Programing and if corporate America had their way we'd have a totally rocking line of skinny jeans and crop tops suitable for the second trimester of only the most fashionable teenagers.

Dear Stylist: Paris Hilton Should Cut Her Losses and Move to Boca

Dear Stylist,

They tell me Paris Hilton is a young girl. I suppose that's what the dancing on the tables, all too often with hands above head and dare I say snapping, is about. However are we the only ones who have noticed a shift in her wardrobe lately?


We've always preferred Ms. Hilton sans weave but we don't really see the point of teasing the natural do into a poufy oblivion since it seems to add about 40 years to the look. Also, by now hopefully we all can agree on the dangers of wearing animal prints, namely that you look like you've gone one step too far on "vintage" bandwagon and you've spent far too much time poking around in Nana's cobweb-filled closet.


I mean, don't get us wrong, we're certainly not implying that Paris would be anything less than the TOAST of the retirement community and she'd likely land a lucrative deal posing for the cover of Joan Collins next and surely scintillating novel Misfortune's Infamous Daughters. We're just saying that she should strongly consider taking her budding "crazy animal-lady" tendencies to more sympathetic pastures than LA.



I hear Del Boca Vista has a few vacancies.

Yours truly,

The Aesthetes