After School Special: AQoT Edition

Ah childhood...Rice Krispies Treats, Capture the Flag, You Can't Do That on Television...those were simpler times. Unfortunately, our inevitable aging has left us prone to sigh's of "kids nowadays..." as we are confronted with that which we do not understand, Ne-Yo, Gossip Girl, The Hills, Justin Timberlake. Ha, just kidding, we totally understand that stuff. What we don't understand lately is what is going on with the next generation (are we at Z yet?) of budding superstars.

Let's start with Vanessa Hudgens. Fine, she took some pictures of herself naked and in the grand scheme of things we're not going to go all Republican on you and say that this is an immoral thing to do we're just saying, did no one explain to her how the Internet works?

And then there's Jamie Lynn Spears. Sure, Britney has made some bad choices that $100 million should be able to prevent one from making, but at least she had the decency to wait until she was in her 20s to have a baby by her totally not famous boyfriend. Shockingly, Nickelodeon seems not to have a problem with the situation. We wonder if they'll try to cover up Zoey 101's baby bump with strategically placed grocery bags a la Claire Huxtable in the 80s.

Apparently, Lily Allen is also pregnant. While not in her teens, she's also not too far removed and she was recently asked to design a line of maternity clothing specifically intended for juniors, like Delia's juniors, otherwise known as girls in their teens and VERY early 20s. In what universe is that a good idea? The least we can do is force girls to wear ugly florals and stirrup pants through their pregnancy as a deterrent.

We've come to the point where we fully expect the next breaking news item on CNN to be Miley Cyrus' gruesome killing spree.

What have we learned here kids, naked photos and pregnancy will not actually harm one's chances of a lucrative future in Children's Programing and if corporate America had their way we'd have a totally rocking line of skinny jeans and crop tops suitable for the second trimester of only the most fashionable teenagers.

Middle Age Looks Great On Cameron Diaz

We find it hard to believe that a full 10 years have passed since the release of the brilliant "My Best Friend's Wedding," (Foreva and eva you'll stay in my heart lalalala...ahem...sorry) and with that, its scene stealer Cameron Diaz has just turned 35. Surely 35 isn't old in the real world and especially the Aesthetes who live by the motto "never peak in high school" commend those who age gracefully. In Hollywood however, 35 is uncomfortably close to over the hill. Luckily though, Cameron Diaz has never looked better.

She's such a fabulous example of jeans and t-shirt elegance. Ms. Diaz seems to be settling into a wardrobe of classics that fit and flatter both on and off screen.


And homegirl can really rock herself some yellow.


We're happy Mr. Sexyback is no longer in the picture. We hated when Cameron went brunette as well as the crazed paparazzi beating behavior that went along with it. We'll even go so far as wantonly blaming Timberlake for the the horrible "The Holiday."

No one can predict what the future may hold and we admit we are a little concerned based on the star's penchant for sun exposure, but for now Cameron, stay far away from the botox, those mini wrinkles around the eyes should be welcomed and applauded because middle age looks great on you.

Denim on Denim...On Denim

We've never felt so much like we were in a codependent, on-again, off-again relationship than when we're thinking about or discussing denim on denim. In fact, we feel like we've just had a conversation with a Justin Bobby (read: head exploding in moment of hari kiri) every time we have to talk about it. Let's explain. For years, YEARS, although we've never, ever, deigned to wear it ourselves , we've sort of maintained the position that maybe, when executed correctly, denim on denim might be a legitimate fashion possibility. (Phat Tony: "Oh, awkward.... umm... I think I wore a denim jacket at the same time I was wearing jeans once. There was, however, a non-denim segue that softed the edge a little bit, but still... never again. In truth, before I left my apartment that night, I was thinking it was a risk I would be willing to make, but not even halfway through the evening, I was feeling awkward in that 'ugh, I'd kill for a Juicy Couture velour sweatsuit right now.' And, as we all know, that's a clear sign that something was wrong.... I've learned my lesson.")

Through thick and thin, as if we were working very hard in couples therapy, we've thought, hey, one can pull of most looks with the right amount of bravado, denim on denim should be no exception. Even when faced with hard times we kept the faith.

This picture is a visual expression of the innocence of youth, is it not? Before the baby dropping, before Jessica Biel...we long for simpler times when matching denim on denim outfits said "togetherness." Unfortunately, it also says BIG FLAMING MISTAKE. (PH: "And what about 'denim patchwork' cries 'subtly irony and elegence'? NOTHING.")

As if we finally summoned the courage to end a bad relationship, we've finally admitted that there are zero situations in life that call for denim on denim. Not matching, not contrasting, not when paired with horrible sneakers and a midriff bearing white tee.


We challenge the public to show us a correct, even passable, interpretation of the denim on denim scenario. Anyone....anyone?