Get It Together: Cousin It Shoes

Dear Kate Moss,

Right, so you're cute in that "maybe I partake in the occasional illegal substance but at least I don't eat junk food sort of way." For this reason, we've consistently looked the other way during your five year fling with fringed moccasins and/or Pete Doherty.


We're not really going to hate on this choice of footwear too badly because for one thing Kate, you can pull this off. Sienna Miller might be different story but like Charles Barkley, you are not a role model.

What we do take issue with is these little beauties strutting down the Etro runway.

Look closely, squint if you have to, but these are actually a pair of suede fringed sandals a la Cousin It. Do you hear me Moss? Fringed. Sandals. Suede. We blame this on you. I hope you're happy with yourself.

Yours truly,

The Aesthetes

Sorry Ash, But We've Already Picked Our Favorite Twin

Hi, Mary Kate? So remember when we poked fun at a couple of your key fashion choices? We also may have made one or two thin jokes? Yeah...um...awkward...because deep down we really sort of love you.

There are very few true living fashion icons out there. Discounting those who dress themselves with the help of a capable stylist and those who put themselves together quite nicely but without any risk-taking, there are only one or two people worth mentioning. Kate Moss comes to mind as she embodies a palpable "signature style" copied by celebrities, regular folks and most recently pumped out to the masses in the form of Kate Moss by Topshop. We also have recently taken notice of Carine Roitfeld (check out Angie's profile of her at My Fashion Life). Roitfeld recently made headlines with this crazy futuristic coat:


Is it a bit strange? Yes. Is it also brilliant? We think so.

Mary Kate Olsen is the only American that we find both fascinating and disturbing enough to capture our attention to the same level as the aforementioned women. Do we feel conflicted about her sometimes? Definitely. While MK's fashion tastes almost always tend to be un peu difficile to stomach for the masses, even we questioned her sojourn into "Derelicte" dressing during her brief stint in higher education.

Since then however, we find her choices just interesting enough.

We love the red carpet vintage looks.

The menswear looks


The all black popped with something unexpected look


Finally, our personal favorite, the "I can pile on a whole heap of crazy and still look good look"


We read recently that Mary Kate's fashion role models are almost always men because they dress solely for themselves. That statement really resonated with us because it is not to say that you have given up fashion and aesthetic ideals, it is just that you are working solely for your own opinions and have permanently disconnected from the reigning fashion media. She's out there but she's also fashion forward in a real sense and we can't help admiring that.

Faux Royalty Looks Great On Jonathan Rhys Meyers

Before The Tudors, Mr. Rhys Meyers (Mr. Meyers? Mr. J.R. Meyers? Eh, let's go with J.R.) had amassed an impressive performance CV... but other than Velvet Goldmine and Bend It Like Beckham, we were hard-pressed to sing the appropriately specified praises of this actor. Then came The Tudors, and everything changed. His face was instantly recognizable, a quality not lost on the fashion industry, not to mention every postered surface in New York City.



We don't know about you, but in the past, J.R. seemed a bit manorexic. While the gaunt and vapid thing may have temporarily worked for Kate Moss and Mary Kate, it never worked for you. Your recent project didn't necessarily force burgers down your throat, but it created a context for the body type that was less stylish, more skeletal. One thing the Tudors were good at... staying warm with layers... and if putting a layer of linen under a layer of cotton under a layer of animal skin under a layer of crushed velvet is what works for you, then amen. You don't have the weight issue that Henry VIII is chronicled in paintings as having, and luckily, it doesn't seem like you have a sweating issue.

So while your past is a bit gaussian blur for us, we're thrilled that a career move finally matched the one look you have. If pseudo-oppressive heirarchies and fashion-forward Renaissance-wear is your thing, that's just fine with us because, J.R., faux royalty looks great on you.

Anorexia Speculation Looks Great on Keira Knightley

Is Keira Knightley eating? We happen to be good friends with eating and we know what it looks like. We're fairly certain this is not it.


We wouldn't want you to think we would do something like advocate anorexia. However, the star has never looked better since rumors started swirling around Keira's possible eating disorder. We love the smoky eye and the gold highlights. We don't even mind the edgy toga look as popularized by Preen's recent haute pajamas collection.


Though we fear chocolate is no longer in her culinary vocabulary, we love this deep brown color in Keira's wardrobe.
Has anyone else noticed how she's looking more and more like vintage Winona Ryder every day?


Knightley has recently bumped off Kate Moss as the new face for Chanel's Coco Mademoiselle perfume. Her fame solidified by the Pirates trilogy, the logical next step is major endorsement deals. Kudos Keira, no one in their right mind will be accusing you of being a big fat fatty and all this anorexia speculation looks great on you.

Phat Tony Disclaimer
Please be advised: No judgment or warranty is being made with respect to the accuracy, reliability or other evidentiary relevance of any scientific or medical analysis, layman observation, or any other source with respect to the content of this site and to the sites to which this page links, whether in regards to the post immediately preceding this disclaimer or otherwise. Furthermore, the pseudonymed collective of Betsy and Phat Tony (hereafter, the "Aesthetes") take no responsibility thereof. Ever. Oh, and res judicata. Habeus Corpus. Stare decisis.

Weighing In: High Waisted Pants

Let's spin a yarn: Picture it, Sicily, 1942... Or maybe it was just last week on the lower east side. Regardless, Betsy was doing a little shopping. Looking for not much in particular I spotted what I thought to be a pair of flowy ivory linen wide leg pants. Snatch. Grabbed my size off the rack and headed towards the dressing room. The sales clerk breezed by stating encouragingly, "those pants fit so great they are really high waisted." Time stopped. High-waisted? Laughing nervously, I pressed on, not wanting to be rude, into the fitting area. Well, what can I say friends, it was as if Bea Arthur's wardrobe stylist attacked me in my sleep. I lost my appetite for days. Then I saw this:

Mischa Barton is a thin girl. I'd put her at 115 pounds tops. As she scurried past the mirror in the morning, she must've noticed that these jeans MAKE HER LOOK HUGE. Then I saw this:


After all the work Ken Paves and Mike Alexander did on post-divorce Jessica did no one in the Simpson camp call a stylist? Kate Moss can barely pull this off and as we all know, Kate Moss is 100% at the border of the final frontier of edgy. Kate Moss is as far out as you go people. Step away from the high waisted denim.